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44 Batman Jokes That Will Have You Cape-tivated!

Be a joker and go batty for our ludicrous selection of Batman jokes!

Beano Jokes Team
Last Updated:  February 14th 2023

 Want more? We would be Robin you of laughs if we didn't tell you to check out our hilarious Marvel, Superhero or Disney jokes! 

What did Batman ask the sandwich maker?

Got ham?

What does Batman say when he's getting out of bed?

The Dark Knight Rises!

What does Batman call his phone?

The Bat Mobile!

Batman jokes
Batman jokes

What do you call Batman after a game of rugby?

Bruise Wayne!

What did the Caped Crusader say when it was time to play cricket?

I'm the Batman!

A cricket bat and ball

What is Batman's favourite drink?


Where is Batman's favourite place to visit in South Africa?


Why couldn't Batman send a text message?

He didn't have a Bat Signal!

What did Alfred say when the Caped Crusader came back from his holiday?

Welcome Bat!

What do you call it when Batman sends something back at the post office?

Dark Knight Returns!

How does Batman power his remote control?

With bat-teries!

closeup of hand holding a television remote control

Why did Batman run off to the Bat Cave?

He need the Bat Room!

What do you get if you cross Batman and an orange?

Juice Wayne!

Where does Batman have a wash?

In the bat tub!

Clean feet in a bath

How does Batman know when it's time to eat?

Dinner dinner dinner dinner dinner dinner... Batman!

What happened when the Joker steamrollered Batman and Robin?

They became Flatman and Ribbon!

Why does Batman love pancakes?

Because he's the Crepe-d Crusader!

Why does Batman always carry an umbrella??

Because every day is a Wayne-y day!

What happened when Batman had a power cut?

He had a dark night!

What does Batman add to his fruit juice?

Just ice!

What did the bread say to Batman?

Rye so serious!

bread jokes

My friend said I'm starting to annoy her because I relate everything to Batman.

What a Joker!

What's Batman's favourite Chinese dish?

Kung POW chicken!

Why did Batman take a break from fighting crime?

Because it was becoming the Bane of his existence!

What did Batman do when he went shopping?

Got ham!

Why doesn’t Batman like going on nature walks?

He doesn't like Poison Ivy!

Why doesn’t Batman like Mr. Freeze?

He always gives him the cold shoulder!

Why did all the pictures come out dark from Batman’s party?

He forgot to invite the Flash!

Why does Batman never win at cards?

Because he always gets the Joker!

What did Bruce Wayne’s Mum put over his crib?

Bat mobile!

How many caped crusaders does it take to change a light-bulb?

None – they like it dark!

What do you get when you cross Batman with a tree?

Spruce Wayne!

Why is Two-face one of the better villians?

Because he's only half bad!

How does Batman take his coffee?

Black! Like the night!

Why could Batman not go fishing?

Because Robin ate all the worms!

When does Poison Ivy change her underpants?

When they get soiled!

What's Batman's favourite part of a joke?

The punchline!

What does Batman put in his drinks?


What position did Bruce Wayne play on his baseball team?

He was the bat boy!

What do you call it when batman skips church?

Christian Bale!

Why can't Bruce Wayne get a date?

He has bat-breath!

What’s the difference between Batman and a criminal?

Batman goes shopping without Robin!

Up Next: Halloween Jokes!