1.    What's do you call a cross between the Abominable Snowman and pasta?

Spag-yeti!

2.    What do you call fake spaghetti?

An impasta.

3.    Why did the noodle break up?

It just couldn’t deal with the strain.

4.    Why did the spaghetti blush?

Because it saw the salad dressing.

5.    What’s pasta’s favourite sport?

Sauce-ball.

6.    Why did the lasagna apply for a job?

It wanted to bring home the bacon.

7.    What do you call pasta that tells jokes?

Macar-funny.

8.    Why did the ravioli feel stuffed?

It had too much filling.

9.    What’s a pasta’s favourite dance?

The noodle shuffle.

10.    Why was the pasta so relaxed?

It was al dente-ly calm.

11.    Why don’t noodles ever argue?

They just pasta-fist.

12.    What do you call a lazy pasta?

A couch potato-li.

13.    Why did the penne cross the road?

To pasta time.

14.    Why was the chef embarrassed?

He spilled the beans on the linguini.

15.    I was trying to decide which pasta to buy...

Then the penne dropped!

16.    Why did the macaroni win the race?

It pasta-everyone.

17.    What do you call musical pasta?

Spaghett-iTunes.

18.    Why did the fettuccine get promoted?

It was on a rollatini.

19.    Why did the pasta get invited to every party?

It knew how to stir things up.

20.    What do noodles say when they’re excited?

Oh my pasta!

21.    Why did the tortellini go to school?

To become well-rounded.

22.    My sister bet I couldn’t make a car out of spaghetti. 

You should have seen the look on her face when I drove pasta!

23.    Why did the spaghetti start a band?

It had great al-dente-rgy.