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The Ultimate Summer Holiday Timetable!

You've got 6 weeks to fill – here's how to fill it!

It’s the school holidays!

6 weeks off school to fill up with STUFF and ACTIVITIES and NONSENSE and FUN! 5 days a week of 7 hour days for 6 weeks is an amazing 210 HOURS! Here’s one way of filling it…

Have a big ol’ gaze

Do some high-quality staring out the window

Go Marvel mad

Watch every Marvel movie so far (apart from Spider-Man: Homecoming, because that would take longer – you’d have to go to the cinema)

Have a snoop

Investigate the mysterious spacecraft that’s crashed at the bottom of the garden

Doze off

Sleep is meant to be good for you or something – you can probably fit 14 minutes extra napping in somewhere

Get creative

Make a comic! An amazing one!

Get devious!

Carefully, cunningly plan a devastating water balloon attack on a loved one

Get soaked!

Be the victim of a far more cunningly, far more carefully planned, far more devastating water balloon attack by a loved one

Get to grips with new technology

Repair the enigmatic device that came out of the spaceship, and become engulfed in a strange glowing forcefield

Explore metal innards

Take something apart you probably shouldn’t have taken apart

Laugh!

Read and enjoy the Beano Summer Special and all the free gifts that come with it

Experiment!

Invent a silly meal

Destroy the nerves of those that love you most

Annoy your parents

Do a deep dive

Get obsessed with a particular YouTuber and watch all 624 of their uploaded videos

Bring hilarity to the world

Tell the same joke 30 times, getting the same part slightly wrong every time and sending everyone around you insane

Voyage through time and space

Find that you’ve travelled through time using bizarre alien technology, and go through a series of implausible adventures in the past and the future, before reappearing in the present only a few minutes after you initially disappeared

Be mildly amused

Laugh at something really stupid until milk comes out of your nose

Deal with the consequences

Begrudgingly clean the milk up

Get to grips with nature

Find a really, really good stick

Have a mishap

Sit down too fast and be all like ‘Whoa’

Have a slightly larger mishap

Discover you’ve accidentally affected the space-time continuum and people have beaks now, plus nobody can read

Get planning!

Trace exactly where in the past it all went wrong and formulate a plan to return the timeline to its original state

Taste the cleverness!

Chew through a pencil by accident

Get to work

Travel through history fixing what went wrong and having really unlikely adventuresEventually emerge victorious but with nobody any the wiser about the bleak alternate reality you saved them from

Experience true horror

Try a be a good citizen and clean the bathroom

Be sensible

Return the time machine to the alien spaceship you got it from, as humanity isn’t ready for the responsibility of it yet

Get interga-laugh-tic

Get the aliens to tell you some jokes from outer space

Hone your skills

Learn to juggle or something

YOU’VE DONE IT!

That’s the whole summer holidays done! Well done! Wait, hang on…

Have your memory of the entire alien/time-travel adventure mysteriously erased

It’s the school holidays!

6 weeks off school to fill up with OH WOW, WHAT HAPPENED?