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Beano Comic

Athletics Jokes

Ready...steady...laugh! It's time for some athletic jokes! Check out these funny athletic jokes, they really set a high bar!

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Beano Jokes Team
Last Updated:  August 19th 2024

These athletics jokes are going for gold! Have a giggle with these athletic jokes and see which of these running gags are the best! If you liked these, we've got more sports stuff here! How about these fab football jokes? You'll be BALLING with laughter! Or maybe you'd like these hilarious hockey jokes? And you can check out even more funny stuff on our main jokes page!

Why don't athletes ever get hot?

They have a lot of fans!

What's a Hungarian runner's favourite food?

Go-lash!

Why was the Marathon runner taken to jail?

He was resisting a rest!

What's an athlete's favourite country?

Iran!

What do you call an athlete that isn't that good?

A try-athlete!

I used to be a professional skier...

But it all went downhill!

Why don't athletes walk into bars?

Because they jump over them!

What do you call a joke about athletes?

A running gag!

If athletes get athlete's foot, what do astronauts get?

Mistletoe!

Relay runners...

You've got to hand it to them!

Why does Finland have such good runners?

Because they always Finnish first!

Why was the Marathon runner sad?

He'd suffered the agony of defeat!

Did you hear about the gardener who lost the race?

He took the wrong root!

Why are runners so bad at remembering things?

They always need to jog their memories!

Did you hear about the fish that ran the London marathon?

It came in last plaice!

Why did the snowman have to stop running?

He couldn't warm up!

Why was the DJ disqualified from the race?

She kept changing tracks!

What do you get if you run in front of a car?

Tired!

What do you get if you run behind a car?

Exhausted!

Vampire Chair

Trick or Treat?

Choose wisely...