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Back to School: Can You Create The Perfect Teacher?

Could you build the world's greatest teacher? Or just a hideous mutant? Take this monstrous quiz to find out!

Beano Quiz Team
Last Updated:Β  July 1st 2021

The year is 2035, and the Government has totally run out of sensible ideas. They've asked YOU to design a new super-teacher to finally crush bad behaviour in the schools of Futuro-Britain.

They've given you an unlimited budget and access to a high-tech genetic engineering lab. What could go wrong?

Will you give the Government what it wants? Or will you blow all their money on something daft? Take this quiz to find out!


Pick an arm:


Which of these is the best teaching style?


What does your perfect teacher eat for lunch?


What's the most important thing when choosing a new teacher?


Pick a leg:


How does your teacher punish kids who misbehave?

@DCNE | giphy

What's your teacher's biggest weakness?


Pick an accessory:


What would the class swot give your perfect teacher to try and impress them?

@91days | giphy

How does your teacher get to school?

You created the StrictBot 9000!

You've created a terrifying animatronic robot teacher, capable of shouting at kids from over 7 miles away. Powered by a nuclear fusion core, the StrictBot will be really horrible to everyone for at least the next 10,000 years. It's favourite lesson is PE, because it cannot feel pain and never gets tired.Why on Earth did you create such a scary teacher?

You created Mrs Kraken!

Using a combination of modern technology and ancient magick, you have summoned a giant squid monster from the bottom of the ocean! Mrs Kraken is 500 metres long and eats fishing ships whole, before disappearing back into the deep to prepare for tomorrow afternoon's lesson.Her favourite subject is geography and she's actually very nice once you get to know her.Β 

You created Mr Perkins!

Mr Perkins looks like a pretty ordinary maths teacher. Well, except that he's all lumpy and makes a buzzing noise when he talks. You see, Mr Perkins is actually a COLONY OF BEES pretending to be a human! That's right, underneath his skin is thousands of thousands of bees, all working together to teach maths.Β He likes honey sandwiches and has ZERO sense of humour - but he doesn't set much homework and is very friendly.

You created Madame Squeec!

Madame Squeec is a totally new kind of teacher. Back in the 2020's, scientists worked out you could increase intelligence by mixing the DNA of humans and animals. She's the only teacher in the UK that is 70% otter, and as a result is very good at languages. As well as speaking French, Spanish and German, she can also speak Stoat, Weasel, Vole and Badger.Β She's kind, funny and doesn't mind too much if you forget your homework. She does insist on eating snails and clams at her desk though, which is pretty gross.