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Captain America Jokes

Good (Chris) Evan’s above! The USA is under threat from all sorts of enemy. But there’s someone who can shield it from attack! Yes it’s the one and only Captain America. What a star! And it’s lucky that he’s got a good sense of humour because these jokes about him are shield-curlingly bad!

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Beano Jokes Team
Last Updated:  January 11th 2022

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Why did Chris Hemsworth look up?

Chis Evan’s Above! 

Why did the Captain America film win an Oscar?

Good Evans!

Chris Pine, Chris Hemsworth, Chris Reeve, Chris Pratt and Chris Evans are all singing Jingle Bells?

Christmas carol jokes
Christmas carol jokes

It’s a Mass Chris Carol!

 What happens when you put Chris Pine, Chris Hemsworth, Chris Reeve, Chris Pratt and Chris Evans in the same room?

A Chrisis meeting!


Why couldn’t Captain America find Thor’s brother?

He was Low-key!

Why was Captain America avoiding Thor?

He Odin money!

If everything goes wrong, What is Captain America’s plan for the USA?

USB!

Who does Captain America call when he has wrinkly tights?

Iron-Man!

Why is Captain America like a statue?

A dad dressed as a superhero

Because he’s a marble Superhero!

Why does Iron man have to save the world?

Because Captain American’t

Captain America was wondering where Wonder Woman bought her shield but then he remembered...

A person clearly keen on doing homework

Amazon!

Captain America’s a big fan of shields.

They’re really something he can really get behind!

They used to call Captain America… 

A man dressed in a USA world war 2 uniform

Lieutenant America!

Did you hear Ant Man will be in the next Captain America movie?

It’s a tiny role!

What’s a superhero’s favourite type of coffee?

Captain Americano!

Why didn’t Captain America hold Thors hammer?

He didn’t wanna steal his thunder!

Captain America, Thor, and Iron Man went to the Lego store…

Avengers trivia

"Avengers, assemble!"

What do you get when you cross Captain America with The Incredible Hulk?

A star-spangled Banner.

Which superhero won a singing competition?

Captain American Idol!

What does Captain America say when he wants an orchestra?

Avengers, ensemble!