I assume you’ve clicked on this page because you want to learn more about Beanotown’s most powerful man: me, Wilbur Brown.
If you want to know about my achievements and successes which led me to become Beanotown’s mayor, you might want to pull up a comfortable chair, because it’s going to take ages.
But, as Beanotown’s mayor, I’ll have to make it brief because I’m a very busy – and powerful – man.
Before becoming mayor, I studied at Oxford and went on to found the dazzlingly brilliant WilburCorp, which is doing rather well, thank you very much. I want to be Prime Minister, but I firmly believe that owning a big business and being a mayor is far more influential. I say this to myself several times every day.
I’m married to Muriel, and together we have a son called Walter. You’ll have heard of Walter, and we expect big things from him in the future. I’m sure he’ll become Prime Minister one day. His middle name is Margaret, in honour of the Iron Lady herself, Baroness Thatcher. What a woman.
I’m not sure how it this happened, but we live next door to the Menace family. How and why, more importantly, should a family of our influence and power live next door to a bunch of oiks? I’m sure they’d love a swimming pool like the one in our big garden. It’s a sign of my extraordinary success as a businessman and politician.
When I’m not being the most powerful man in Beanotown, I work out in my home gym and maintain my big muscles. I dislike the idea of being weak, which is something I have never been or ever will be.
I can tell you’re a fan of mine, and expect you want to learn more about my life.
Read on to find out some essential facts about I, Wilbur Brown. These were written by someone else, but I've not checked them, due to my responsibilities as mayor and successful businessman.
I assume they're all fantastic facts and, most importantly, completely correct.
Wilbur Brown Fact File
Name: Wilbur Brown
Birthday: 16th January
Best friend: Wilbur doesn't have friends, but he likes to hang out with people who are more powerful than him. It makes him feel important.
Worst enemy: People who get in his way
Prized possessions: He has a collection of stuffed animals on his study wall
Motto: Wilbur first!
Super skill: Wilbur can spot a chance to make money in anything, even times when people are miserable
Family: Wife Muriel, son Walter, cat Clawdia and dog Foo-Foo
Address: Tranquility, 53 Gasworks Road. The house with the pool, right next door to Dennis
Fact: Wilbur's first job was when he took over his father's shop: Brown's TV Rentals and Aerials