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20 Alpaca Jokes To Make You Do A Spit-Take!

We're not trying to fleece you - these alpaca jokes will have you braying with laughter!

Beano Jokes Team
Last Updated:  April 14th 2024

Love laughing at llamas? Then you'll adore adventuring with alpacas! These jokes aren't woolly at all - you'll be spitting with laughter! Share these jokes with your herd for maximum giggles! And don't forget to check out our other jokes - have a laugh at mooses, or swans! And if you're mad about alpacas, why not read our alpaca facts?

I got spit on by a farm animal and it felt like the end of the world…

It was just the alpaca lips!

What’s more amazing than a talking alpaca?

A spelling bee!

What do you call a smart alpaca?


What did the alpaca see when it looked in the mirror?

Its spitting image!

What did the alpaca say to the grass?

“Nice gnawing you!”

Why should you never buy something from an alpaca?

They’ll always fleece you!

What’s an alpaca’s favourite singer?

Llama del Rey!

What’s an alpaca’s favourite coffee?


What do you call a secret society of alpacas?

The il-llama-nati!

What is an alpaca’s favourite 80s song?

Llama Chameleon!

What should you say when you meet an alpaca?

“Fleeced to meet you!”

I got really hungry when we visited the alpaca farm...

Next time I go, alpaca lunch!

What is an alpaca’s favourite drink?


What did Mario say when he saw an alpaca?

“Don’t worry, it’s a false-a llama!”

What’s green, woolly and moves very slowly?

The zombie alpacalypse!

What do you get if you cross a tortoise and an alpaca?

A turtleneck sweater!

What did the alpaca say when he heard he was going on holiday?

“Alpaca my bags!”

What does an alpaca keep in its bedroom?

A llama lamp!

Why don’t llamas like singing with backing music?

They prefer to sing alpacapella!

llama jokes

Who’s a llama’s favourite actor?

Al Pacacino!

llama jokes