Carrot Jokes | Eat Them to Defeat Them

We've 'hand-picked' the funniest carrot jokes!

Too much crunch in these jokes? If you like your vegetables a little greener head on over to broccoli jokes, or dig your ladle into our bubbling pot of funny food jokes!

Why are potatoes better for your vision than carrots?

Because they start their life in an eye!

Why was the snowman at the carrot section of the grocery store?

They were picking their nose!

What did the snowman say to the aggressive carrot?

Get out of my face!

Why do sailors eat so many carrots?

It helps them sea better!

Why was the programmer eating carrots?

So that they could C#!

Why do carrots improve your sight?

They contain vitamin see!

I ran out of carrots so I called a replacement...

But it didn't turnip!

What does a carrot priest say?

Lettuce pray!

What did the rabbit say to the carrot?

It's been nice gnawing you!

How do you kill a salad?

You go for the carrot-id artery!

Why is a carrot orange and pointy?

Because if it was green and round, it would be a pea!

Did you hear about the carrot detective?

He got to the root of every case!

Doctor, doctor! I feel like a carrot!

Don't get yourself in a stew!

What do you call a Triceratops with carrots in its ears?

Anything you like, it can't hear you!

Why did the carrot get an award?

Because it was out standing in his field!

What did one snowman say to the other?

Can you smell carrots?

What's a vegetable's favourite martial art?

Carrotee!

Knock, knock! Who's there? Carrot. Carrot who?

Do you carrot all about me?!

Why did the carrot blush?

Because it saw the salad dressing!

How do you make gold soup?

Put 24 carrots in it!

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