Dinosaur Jokes

Big, funny dinosaur jokes for anyone who hasn't got a prehistoric sense of humour!

These dinosaur jokes will reign for aeons... If you like your animal jokes a bit less extinct, check out our bird jokes too - they're like dinosaurs, just a bit more evolved!

What do you get when dinosaurs crash their cars?

Tyrannosaurus wrecks!

What do you call a dinosaur fart?

A blast from the past!

Why does a Brontosaurus have a long neck?

Because its feet smell.

Why did the dinosaur take a bath?

To become ex-stinked!

What do you call a dinosaur who wears glasses?

A Doyouthinkysaraus!

What should you do if you find a dinosaur in your bed ?

Find somewhere else to sleep!

What do you get if you cross a pig with a dinosaur?

Jurassic pork!

Why did the dinosaur cross the road?

Because chickens hadn't evolved yet!

Why did the T-rex cross the road?

To eat the chicken on the other side!

What sport is a Brontosaurus good at?

Squash!

What does a Triceratops sit on?

Its tricerabottom!

Why are dinosaurs no longer around?

Because their eggs stink.

What was the scariest prehistoric animal?

The Terror-dactyl!

Which dinosaurs are the worst drivers?

Tyrannosaurus wrecks!

Do you know how long dinosaurs lived?

The same as short ones!

Why did the T-rex eat raw meat?

Because its itty-bitty arms couldn't work the oven!

Where do Velociraptors spend their pocket money?

At a dino-store!

What do you call a sleeping T-rex?

A dino-snore!

Where do walruses go to see movies?

The dive-in!

What has a spiked tail, plates on its back, and sixteen wheels?

A Stegosaurus on roller skates!

What is the best thing to do if you see a T-rex?

Pray he doesn't see you!

What's the difference between a strawberry and a Tyrannosaurus?

The strawberry is red!

What's the best way to raise a baby dinosaur?

With a crane!

What do you get when a dinosaur sneezes?

Out of the way as quickly as you can!

What do you call a dinosaur as tall as a house, with long sharp teeth, and 12 claws on each foot?

Sir!

When can three giant dinosaurs get under an umbrella and not get wet?

When it's not raining!

What do you find on a dinosaur's floor?

Rep-tiles!

How many dinosaurs can you fit in an empty box ?

One - after that, the box isn't empty!

What kind of dinosaur can you ride in a rodeo?

A Bronco-saurus!

What do you get when a dinosaur walks through a strawberry patch?

Strawberry jam!

What's green and hangs from trees?

Dinosaur snot.

What came after the dinosaur?

Its tail!

What's as big as a dinosaur but weighs nothing?

Its shadow!

What makes more noise than a dinosaur?

Two dinosaurs!

Can you name 10 dinosaurs in 10 seconds?

Yes, 8 Iguanadons and 2 Stegasaurus!

What does a dinosaur call a porcupine?

A toothbrush!

What is found in the middle of dinosaurs ?

The letter "s"!

What do you call a dinosaur that never gives up?

Try-try-try-ceratops!

What do dinosaurs have that no other animals have?

Baby dinosaurs!

How do you know if there is a dinosaur in your refrigerator?

The door won't shut!

Who made sure the dinosaurs obeyed the law?

Tricera-cops!

How does a T-rex cut wood?

With a dinosaw!

What do you call a Triceratops with carrots in its ears?

Anything you like, it can't hear you!

What do you call a Tyrannosaurus rex when it wears a cowboy hat and boots ?

Tyrannosaurus Tex!

Why did the dinosaur paint her toenails red?

So she could hide in the strawberry patch!

A racoon playing a guitar - follow the link from our dinosaur to our animal jokes

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