Monday Jokes

Check out Beano's batch of merry Monday jokes! There's enough to cure that monotonous Monday blues and get you through the week!

If you're not 'week' with laughter yet, try some humdinging holiday jokes out for size! 

Perhaps some clever jokes or maybe even classic corny jokes are more your style?

For more comedy inspiration, head over to Beano's great joke generator

During the school year, what’s the number one thing kids wish for on Sunday night?

A foot of snow by morning!

When does Monday come before Sunday?

In the dictionary!

Why did the corrupt calendar go to prison?

Monday laundering!

Why didn’t the skeleton laugh at Monday jokes?

He didn’t find them humerus!

Why did the cat stay home from school on Monday?

He wasn’t feline well!

How do cheeses greet each other on Monday mornings?

Have a Gouda week!

What did the Cyclops say every Monday morning?

Eye don’t want to get up!

What does Sonic need a lot of on Mondays?


What’s the saddest part of the week?

Monday mourning!

Why was the acid so rude on Monday?

It was a-mean-o-acid!

How do hens feel on Mondays?


Which day of the week are demons most tired?

De-Monday, just like everyone else!

If every day is a gift...

How do you return Monday?!

On Monday morning, rolling out of bed is easy.

Getting up off the floor is another story!

What word describes Mondays best?


Which day of the week makes werewolves howl?


How did Garfield stop the rooster from waking him on Monday morning?

He ate him on Sunday night!

Do you know why I stay up late on weekends?

Because sleep is for the week!

What do you call an ant that sells medicines on weekdays and helps a farmer on weekends?

A farmassistant!

I called the local gym asking if they can train me to do gymnastics. They asked how flexible I am...

I said, I'm free Monday, Tuesday and Friday!

Mondays aren't so bad...

Only 48hrs ago it was a sadder day!

Who would win in a fight between Monday and Sunday?

Sunday... Monday is a weekday!

Next up: food jokes, banana jokes

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