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24 Stupid Jokes Which Are So Bad They're Clever

Approach the comedy buffet and prepare to stuff your face with some really stupid jokes!

Beano Jokes Team
Last Updated:  July 29th 2021

Some jokes are so clever they could be mistaken for an owl who dabbles in rocket science, but not our stupid jokes. Some jokes are so daft, they're the exact opposite of whatever that owl is. These are those types of jokes

Once you've recovered from laughing your shoes off that this lot, check out these awesome school jokes and jokes for kids (that's you!). 

Why did the puny lettuce go to the gym?

It wanted to get shredded!

What do cows like to watch on Netflix?

A good moo-vie!

A black and white cow eating popcorn

Why did Cinderella not get picked for the netball team?

She kept running away from the ball!

Cinderella on a netball court

Where would you learn to make a Knickerbocker Glory?

At sundae school!

Two sundaes

What do you call a cow that nibbles your grass?

A lawn moo-er!

A brown cow chewing grass

Who is the smartest creature in the sea?

Fish, because they live in schools!

A fish

Why did the bike have a nap?

It was two-tyred!

What is Harry Potter’s favourite subject at Hogwarts?


Harry Potter

Are there any Halloween monsters who are good at maths?

Nope, unless you Count Dracula!

Dracula and maths equipment

Where’s the warmest part of a room?

The corner, because it’s always 90 degrees!

A cold person

Why couldn’t the pony sing?

It was a little hoarse!

A sad pony

Two men went to court for stealing a calendar...

They were given six months each!

Two prisoners

What do call a quiet Hawaiian laugh?


A man in a Hawaiian shirt

What would you call an elf who’s won the lottery?

Very welfy!

A rich elf

Where do penguins keep their savings?

In a snow bank!

Penguin and coins

What's small and washes up on beaches?


A microwave on a beach

What computer can keep you dry in a storm?

A Mac!

A computer in a storm

What do you call a bee that can't make a decision?

A maybe?

A bee on a windowsill

How do you get a small astronaut off to sleep?

You rocket!

A young astronaut

What sits at the bottom of the sea and bites its nails?

A nervous wreck!

A shipwreck

Why do words and punctuation always end up in court?

Because they are waiting to be sentenced!

book jokes

Why don’t you make a joke angry?

Because it always has a punchline!

Why should you check your tyres for punctures?

In case there's a fork in the road!