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40 Yoga Jokes & Puns That Aren't A Stretch!

Are you after some side-splitting yoga jokes will have you rolling on your yoga mat in hysterics? You'll find them within!

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Beano Jokes Team
Last Updated:  February 21st 2023

Did you know you stretch more muscles laughing than you do frowning? Well let's keep that sense of humour flexible with some much-needed belly laughs! Ready to warm up? Scroll on down to the mat and prepare for chuckling pose!

But if yoga isn't quite your thing... we've got plenty of other jokes to choose from! Just take a peek at these geography jokes, these lizard jokes, or even these fish and chip jokes! What a selection! And there's lots more over on our main jokes page, too!

Ok, back to the main event - yoga jokes!

I didn’t think yoga would fix my posture…

But I stand corrected!

What does Jack Sparrow do instead of yoga?

Pilates of the Caribbean!

Why did the yogi return the vacuum cleaner?

It came with too many attachments!

Why did the yogi refuse novocaine at the dentist?

She wanted to transcend-dental-medication!

What did the yogi tell his mum to stop her leaving yoga class?

Nah ma, stay!

Why did the yogi get fired from her job as a cashier?

Because she kept saying change comes from within!


People say yoga will change your life

I think that’s a bit of a stretch!

How does the yogi order a pizza slice?

Make me one with everything!

Why does everyone love yoga teachers?

They bend over backwards for you.!

What do you call a bagel that’s mastered yoga?

A pretzel!

What did the yogi tell his dog?

Nama-stay!

Why does the bear love yoga class?

It’s a good chance to paws and reflect!

What did the cow say in yoga class?

Oooooom!

Why is the apple so good at yoga?

He’s got a great core!

What does the yoga teacher want for their birthday?

Just your presence!

I’m worried I’m not that good at yoga

Some days, I feel like just a poser!

Why did the bagel struggle in yoga class?

It couldn’t find its centre!

What did the yoga teacher say when she arrested someone?

You’ve got the right to remain silent!

What do you call yoga for kids?

Twister!

What do you do when a yoga guru goes missing?

Nothing. They’ll find themselves!

What did the yogi say when her friend asked her to leave the party?

Nah, Imma stay!

I’ve been practicing yoga for decades

It’s been a long stretch!

What does the job ad for the yoga studio say?

Inquire within!

Why do vegetable lovers love practicing yoga regularly?

To find their inner peas!

What is the most romantic yoga pose?

Pro-pose!

I gave my cat some almond milk the other day

Now she teaches yoga!

I tried to get my grandpa to go to yoga class yesterday…

It was a bit of a stretch!

A grandad thinking

How do you know when a yoga teacher is angry?

He gets incensed!

My doctor doesn’t want me to go to yoga anymore

He thinks I self-meditate too much!

What kind of yoga do zombies do?

Decom-pose!

What’s a pirate’s least favorite yoga move?

The plank pose!

Why is it easy to make an appointment with a yoga teacher?

They’re just so flexible!

What kind of car is the best at yoga?

Mercedes Bends!

What do you say at the end of a squirrel yoga class?

Nutmaste!

What does the yogi say when she got electrocuted?

Ohmmmmmm!

Why would someone bring a lightsabre to a yoga class?

Misread the brochure, they must have!

Have you heard of the new class where you go up and down?

They call it yo-yoga!

What do you call someone doing yoga with the flu?

Sick and twisted!

A man was arrested for stealing yoga DVDs

Now he's doing a long stretch!

How did T-Rex feel after doing yoga for the first time?

Dinosore!