Christmas Jokes

Turn ho ho ho into ha ha ha with icicle-sharp funny Christmas jokes for kids from Beano...

More Christmas jokes

What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?


Who delivers your dog’s Christmas presents?

Santa Paws!

What do you get if Santa forgets to wear his undercrackers?

Saint Knickerless!

What does Santa use to bake cakes?

Elf-raising flour!

What happens to naughty elves?

They get the sack!

What says "Oh Oh Oh"?

Santa walking backwards!

What do frogs love about Christmas?


What's red and white, red and white, red and white?

Santa rolling down a hill!

What do you call Santa when he's on a tea break?

Santa Pause!

What's James Bond's favourite Christmas grub?

Mince spies!

Why are Christmas trees bad at sewing?

They always drop their needles!

Doctor, doctor! I’m scared of Father Christmas!

You’re suffering from Claus-trophobia!

How much did Santa pay for his sleigh?

Nothing, it was on the house!

Why does Santa have three gardens?

So he can hoe, hoe, hoe!

Who delivers Christmas presents to sharks?

Santa Jaws!

What is Santa's sister called?

Mary Christmas!

What reindeer has the worst manners?


What do reindeer hang on their Christmas trees?


What do you call someone who is afraid of Santa?


What do elves learn in school?

The elf-abet!

If you liked this, then you should try watching Ghost Jokes

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