Skip to main content

Crocodile Jokes

These snappy jokes are sure to keep you entertained for a croco-while!

We think you’ll love these snappy crocodile jokes! If you enjoyed these we also have some fabulous flamingo jokes, some chicken chuckles with our chicken jokes, and for a real gir-laugh, these giraffe jokes ought to hit the spot!

And as always, there’s our jokes generator for all your joke needs!

What do you get if you cross a computer and a crocodile?

A lot of bytes!

What do you get when you cross a frog and an alligator?

A croak-odile!

How many arms has a crocodile got?

Depends how many people he’s eating!

Are you a caiman?

Yes, I’m fine!

What’s a crocodile’s favourite card game?

Snap!

What should you say to a crocodile on it’s birthday?

Snappy birthday!

What’s an alligator’s favourite music?

Punk-croc!

What’s a crocodile’s favourite game?

Croc-quet!

What do crocodiles decorate their bathrooms with?

Rep-tiles!

What’s the difference between a crocodile and an alligator?

One you’ll see in a while and the other you’ll see later

What do call a crocodile detective?

An investigator!

What do you call a crocodile who robs banks?

A crook-adile!

What should you say if an alligator arrests you?

It’s a fair croc!

Why don’t Egyptian crocodiles admit when they’re wrong?

Because they’re in de-nile!

Why don’t crocodiles like fast food?

It’s too hard to catch!

What do you get when you cross a crocodile and a rooster?

A croc-a-doodle-doo!

Who gives crocodiles presents on Christmas?

Santa Jaws!

What do you call a crocodile with a map?

A navi-gator!

What do alligators do in an emergency?

They croco-dial 999!

A man walks into a café and says

‘Get me a crocodile sandwich, and make it snappy!’

What did the crocodile say to the giraffe?

“I’ve always looked up to you!”

Why did Myles Stephenson ask a crocodile to pack his case for going into the jungle?

I'm a celebrity get me out of here jokes

Because he’s a snappy dresser!