Dirty Jokes

You'll not want to WASTE these jokes on just anyone! You may even feel grimy after reading Beano's diabolically dirty jokes!

Not filthy enough for you? Try out these toilet, poop or gross jokes! 

Who cleans up all the dirt in the ocean?

Mer-maids!

What animals are scared of vacuum cleaners?

Dust bunnies!

Why do basketball players have dirty rooms?

They're always dribbling!

I found a good bread recipe where you don't have to get your hands dirty from mixing it...

The bread was kneadless, to say!

Who's the leader of the rubbish army?

General Waste!

What do you call a frog stuck in mud?

Unhoppy!

How did the kids from Stranger Things clean up Hawkins?

Dustin!

What's brown and sits in the forest?

Winnie's Pooh!

What happened to the blind skunk?

She fell in love with a fart!

Why did the toilet paper roll down the hill?

To reach the bottom!

Why was Eeyore down the toilet?

Because he was looking for Pooh!

I've got a book in my bathroom that I write my feelings and personal thoughts into while on the toilet.

I call it my diarrhea!

I recently bought a toilet brush.

Long story short, I'm going back to toilet roll!

What did the poo say to the fart?

You blow me away!

Did you hear about the constipated maths teacher?

He had to work it out with a pencil!

What's brown and sounds like a bell?

Dung!

Why does Piglet smell of farts?

Because he plays with Pooh!

What’s always on the ground but doesn’t get dirty?

Your shadow!

Knock, knock! Who's there? Smellmop. Smellmop who?

Ew! No thanks!

When does coffee taste like mud?

When it's ground!

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