Ghost Jokes

Ghoulishly funny ghost jokes from Beano the grave...

Why are ghosts bad at telling lies?

You can see right through them!

Why did the ghost go to the theatre?

To see a phantomime!

What do ghosts say to their children?

Spook when you're spooken to!

What did the daddy ghost say to the baby ghost?

Fasten your sheet belt!

What do you call a ghost who haunts fireplaces?

A toasty ghosty!

When do ghosts eat breakfast?

In the moaning!

Why did the ghost go to the sales?

He was a bargain haunter!

On what day are ghosts most scary?


Which Shakespeare play do ghosts like best?

Romeo and Ghoul-iet!

What do ghosts put on their turkey?


What was the ghost's best position?


What tool helps a ghost lie perfectly flat?

A spirit level!

What should you say if you meet a ghost?

"How do you boo?"

What do you find up a ghost’s nose?


How do ghosts fly?

British Scareways!

What do you do when 50 ghosts visit your house?

Hope it's Halloween!

What ghosts haunt hospitals?

Surgical spirits!

How did Ebeneezer Scrooge score a goal?

The Ghost of Christmas passed!

What's the one room a ghost doesn't need in its house?

A living room!

Why didn't the skeleton go to the party?

He had no body to go with!

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