20 Hand Jokes That Win Hands-Down!
Hey you! Looking for some human body belly-laughs? Get a grip with these thumb-tastic hand jokes!
Can't keep your mitts off these hilarious hand jokes? Check out these toe jokes, eye jokes, or even take a bite of these teeth jokes! We've got loads of jokes! Don't believe us? Just look at our amazing Joke Generator! ... See?!
What's the best time?
6.30 - hands down!
![](https://www.beano.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/05/clock.jpg?quality=76&strip=all&w=1024)
How do you wash your hands at Christmas?
With hand Santatizer!
![Laughing Father Christmas sitting down with his right hand in the air](https://www.beano.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/05/shutterstock_160224428.jpg?quality=76&strip=all&w=1024)
What has 5 fingers but isn't your hand?
My hand!
![](https://www.beano.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/05/1-3.jpg?quality=76&strip=all&w=1024)
What has 6 legs, 6 eyes and 6 hands?
6 pirates!
![](https://www.beano.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/05/aboard.jpg?quality=76&strip=all&w=1024)
What's the best way to hold a bat?
By the handle!
![](https://www.beano.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/04/4-11.png?quality=76&strip=all&w=1024)
How many skateboarders does it take to change a light bulb?
One, but it'll take 100 tries!
![](https://www.beano.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/04/11-19.png?quality=76&strip=all&w=1024)
I sprained my thumb today
On the other hand, I'm doing ok!
![](https://www.beano.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/03/2-17.png?quality=76&strip=all&w=1024)
What's so nice about the skeleton?
He always lends a hand!
![](https://www.beano.com/wp-content/uploads/legacy/79786_skeleton-jokes-3.png)
What's worse than having a big nose?
Having a big nose and tiny hands!
![](https://www.beano.com/wp-content/uploads/legacy/77088_14.png)
What's the difference between a bison and a buffalo?
You can't wash your hands in a buffalo!
![](https://www.beano.com/wp-content/uploads/legacy/74912_joke-2.png)
What type of tree fits snugly in your hand?
A palm tree!
![](https://www.beano.com/wp-content/uploads/legacy/70222_Generic4.png)
If you had 4 apples and 5 oranges in one hand and 6 apples and 7 oranges in the other, what would you have?
Very large hands!
![number jokes](https://www.beano.com/wp-content/uploads/legacy/62638_00-gen3.jpg)
I got a new pair of gloves today, but they're both left-ies
One the one hand, it's great. On the other, it's not!
![one-liner jokes](https://www.beano.com/wp-content/uploads/legacy/61450_00-gen5.jpg)
A thief was arrested for stealing loaves of sourdough...
They were caught bread handed!
![bread jokes](https://www.beano.com/wp-content/uploads/legacy/57964_gen38.jpg)
What do you say when you hand someone an avocado?
Havacado!
![](https://www.beano.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/05/Generic7.png?quality=76&strip=all&w=1024)
How do you catch a fish without a fishing rod?
With your BEAR hands!
![](https://www.beano.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/11/3-bear.jpg?w=1024)
I found a good bread recipe where you don't have to get your hands dirty from mixing it...
The bread was kneadless, to say!
![](https://www.beano.com/wp-content/uploads/legacy/53742_gen55.jpg)
What do you call someone who can eat candy corn with both hands?
Ambidextrose!
![](https://www.beano.com/wp-content/uploads/legacy/53462_Candy8.png)
Why can’t the T-rex clap its hands?
Because it's extinct!
![](https://www.beano.com/wp-content/uploads/legacy/44012_b0952b6b92f2f0892a65fd6fbcd5449f7ea0bcb0f4543383b798cf7b5c36.jpg)
Where did Captain Hook buy his hook?
The second hand shop!
![](https://www.beano.com/wp-content/uploads/legacy/43910_Peterpan7.png)
![](https://www.beano.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/05/Joke_Gen_Image-2.png)
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Do it now!
![](https://www.beano.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/05/nex-up-silly-jokes.jpg)