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20 Lettuce Jokes You Can't Leaf Alone!

Lettuce entertain you with these pea-larious jokes!

Beano Jokes Team
Last Updated:Β  December 10th 2021

You won't be-leaf how funny these lettuce jokes are! If you liked these lettuce based puns, we've got even more food fun with our funny food jokes! We've also got fruit jokes, ice cream jokes and more! And of course you can always find more lols at our jokes hub!

Lettuce has no flavour

That's an issue that really needs addressing!

What do lettuces become when they want to help the community?

They join the Brussel Scouts!

What's an Emperor's favourite food?

Caesar salad!

Why should you always close the fridge door?

You don't want to see the salad dressing!

What do lettuces use to communicate?

Cell-ery phones!

What do lettuces say during an emergency?

Romaine calm!

What did the lettuce say to the carrot?

Peas be mine!

What vegetable is the most soppy?

Lettuce, it's very romaine-tic!

Why did the lettuce win the race?

It was already a head!

Why was the lettuce sad?

It had a lot of emotional cabbage!

What type of lettuce stops babies getting messy?


What type of lettuce can go to the moon?


What do lettuce use to mend clothes?

Cabbage patches!

Why did the puny lettuce go to the gym?

It wanted to get shredded!

How do you know if a lettuce is ill?

It's not looking a bit green!

I know a lot about different types of lettuce

And that's just the tip of the iceberg!

What do you say to a lettuce who wants a fight?

Just leaf it!

What did the vicar say to the vegetable congregation?

Lettuce pray!

Why are lettuces so chill?

They always romaine calm

What floats around the Artic sinking ships?

Iceberg lettuce!