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49 Minions Jokes Which Are Truly Despicable!

Looking for some Gru-vy jokes? Look no more! We've got tons of funny Minion jokes!

Beano Jokes Team
Last Updated:  January 12th 2024

Have a laugh at our store of despicable minion jokes!

Once you're finished giggling it up, check out our appealing banana jokes or try some Disney jokes! 

What do you call a small, yellow onion?

A Minion!

What did the police officer say when they met up with Bob, Stuart, and Kevin?

Yellow, yellow, yellow!

The joke police

Why did the Minions give Gru two banana skins for Christmas?

He said he wanted some slippers!

Did you not like Despicable Me at first?

Maybe it Gru on you over time!

Why did the Minion call an ambulance?

His banana wasn't peeling very well!

How much is in Gru’s bank account?

A Minion dollars!

A man with a silly amount of cash

Why do Minion’s put sun cream on their bananas?

To stop them peeling!

What does a Minion do on the weekend?

Goes to banana sundae school!

What do you get if you cross a pug with Gru?

A Gru pug!

How much do Minions love bananas?

A bunch!

What did the Minion say to the banana?

"You're quiet!"

Why do Minions wear two pairs of trousers when they play golf?

In case they get a hole in one!

A mouldy sandwich watches a game of golf

What does a Minion pour on their Yorkshire Pudding?


A jug of hot gravy

Where do Minions watch funny cat videos?


What happened when Gru told Minions to follow their dreams?

They went back to sleep!

What’s worse than a Minion eating bananas?

A Minion going bananas!

What’s invisible and smells like a banana?

A Minion fart!

A man smelling a bad fart

What do you call a Minion with bad sunburn?

A filet Minion!

What do you call someone who has a large collection of Minions?

A Minion-aire!

What does a Minion say when they’re lifting weights at the gym?

Peel the burn!


How does a Minion answer the phone?


What happened when a Minion returned a library book late?

They had to pay a despicable fee!

What does a Minion dress as at Halloween?

A boo-nana!

What do you call a Nintendo Wii character that looks like Gru?

Despicable Mii!

What does a Minion put in their soup?


What does a Minion mum call her children?

Mini 'uns!

Why did the Minion take their banana to the barber?

They had split ends!

What makes a Minion’s honey?

A despicable bee!

What type of diet does a Minion have?

Gru-ten free!

How do Minions search the internet?

They use Gru-gle!

What’s square and fits on a Minion’s head?

A ban-dana!

Why couldn’t the Minion yell at a high volume?

It could only yell low!

A football fan in a gold or yellow sweatshirt

Why did the Minion cross the road?

To get to his banana!

What’s Kevin’s favourite Tom Cruise movie?

Minion Impossible!

What does a Minion call their grandmother?


A grandma putting some make up on

Where does Gru take Kyle to get his fur trimmed?

The Gru-mers!

What's yellow and always points north?

A magnetic minion!

What's a ghost minion's favourite food?


Why did the minion take his banana to the doctor?

It wasn't peeling very well!

How do minions get downstairs?

They slide down the banana-ster!

Why is despicable me such a popular film?

It's based on a Gru story!

Where do minions buy their clothes?

Banana Republic!

Why do minions love bananas?

They find them appealing!

Why did the minions quit their jobs?

The work was too gru-eling!

What is a minions favourite app?


Why do minions not like horror films?

They are too Gru-some!

What do you call a minion with black stripes?

Despicable bee!

Why was the minion so ill?

He had yellow-fever!

What do minions say when they answer the phone?


An astronaut in space: next up - music, movie, TV and gaming jokes