Skip to main content

20 New Years Jokes That Will Get A Laugh Anytime

Check out Beano's comical concoction of cracking New Year jokes!

🤣
Beano Jokes Team
Last Updated:  August 11th 2021

Make your New Year resolution to laugh more! How? That's easy! Check out Beano's brilliant New Year jokes.

Why not take a look at autumn, Halloween or Christmas jokes!

Why should you always keep your new calendar in the fridge?

So you can start the New Year feeling COOL!

Why does the person who runs Time’s Square on New Year’s feel like a failure?

new year jokes

He always drops the ball!

What does a monster say on New Years?

holiday jokes

Happy new fear!

What should you never eat on New Year’s Eve?

new year jokes

Fire Crackers!

What did the dog say on New Year’s?

holiday jokes

Woof!

What happened to the person who stole a calendar on New Year’s Eve?

He got 12 months!

What does a Ghost say on January 1st?

Happy BOO year!

What happened to the fireworks who were arrested on New Years Eve?

new year jokes

They were let off!

Where is New Years Eve so Mathematical?

Times Square!

Why are there so many vampires out on New Year’s Eve?

For Old Fangs Time!

Why do you need a jeweler on New Years Eve?

To ring in the New Year!

An optimist stays up until midnight to see the new year in.

A pessimist stays up to make sure the old year leaves!

What Does a Field Grow on January 1st?

New Years hay!

What Did Stephen Like to be Called on December 31st?

New Years Steve!

What's a corns favourite holiday?

new year jokes

New Ears Day!

What's a cameras New Years resolution?

1080p!

Knock, knock! Who's there? Mary and Abbie! Mary and Abbie who?

Mary Christmas and a Abby new year!

What do farmers give their wives at Midnight on New Years Eve?

Hogs and kisses!

What do you cows celebrate on December 31st?

Moo years eve!

Why does no one listen to each other on New Years day?

Because it goes in one year and out the other!

Up next: Funny animal jokes!