Skip to main content
Subscribe to our Beano comic! Click Here
Beano Comic

20 Squirrel Jokes Which Are Totally Nutty

Looking for some acorn-y gags? Check out these funny squirrel jokes!

Beano Jokes Team
Last Updated:  October 11th 2021

If you're looking for funny jokes about your furry friends, look no further – we've dug up these better than a-corn-y funny squirrel jokes for you.

Still looking for more jokes? Phew! Luckily we've got LOADS. Take a peek at these bee jokes,  cow jokes or animal jokes! Honestly, we've got so many jokes!

What do you call a fight between squirrels?

A squarrel!

Why is it a bad idea to work for squirrels?

They pay peanuts!

A doctor for overweight squirrels...

is called a nut-ritionist!

I was thrown out of the park for arranging squirrels by height.

They didn’t like me critter sizing!

What's a squirrel's favorite ballet?

The Nutcracker!

What do rich squirrels eat?


Where do squirrels go in a hurricane?

All over the place!

How do squirrels watch TV?

On Nut-flix!

How did the squirrel try to impress his date?

He went out on a limb!

How do you catch a squirrel?

Climb up a tree and act like a nut!

How did the squirrel get lost in the forest?

It followed the wrong root!

Where do squirrels go on holiday?

Beech trees!

What famous squirrel tells the future?


What do squirrels wear on their feet?


What do you call a squirrel in a church?

A chipmunk!

What's invisible and smells like nuts?

Squirrel farts!

What did the tree say to the squirrel?

Leaf me alone!

I'd make fun of what squirrels eat...

But it'd be acorn-y joke!

I saw a squirrel this morning cycling through the park.

I didn't know they can ride bikes!

What do squirrels give each other on Valentine's Day?