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290 Word Jokes That Are So Punny!

What's in a word? Loads of laughs! So ditch the dictionary and wrap your chops round our lexicon of lolz!

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Beano Jokes Team
Last Updated:  December 22nd 2021

These jokes are really rewording! Get ready for some punny word play with these hilarious word jokes! If you've got time for more laughs, check out our clock jokes! We've also got lol-worthy library jokes, and if you liked those, stick your nose in these great book jokes ! Check out more hilarious jokes on our jokes hub!

Why couldn't the skeleton go to prom?

He had nobody to go with!

Why couldn't the butterfly go to prom?

It was a mothball!

When is the worst time to ask someone to prom?

NOvember!

What does this joke and a busy prom have in common?

A bad punch line!

Where do cats go for prom?

The fur ball!

What did the biology student wear to prom?

Designer genes!

Why didn't the prune go to the fruit prom?

She couldn't find a date!

What did the cloud wear to prom?

A rainbow!

Who did Dracula take to prom?

His ghoulfriend!

Why couldn't Bruce Wayne find a prom date?

He had bat breath!

Where do cows go before prom?

The moooovies!

Where did Spiderman find a date for prom?

On the World Wide Web!

Why couldn't the power line go to prom?

It was grounded!

Why do archaeologists always get asked to prom?

Because they date any old thing!

Why did 4 not ask 2 to prom?

He was two square!

Who goes to prom during lockdown?

Quaran-teens!

How do memes go to prom?

In a lmaosine!

Why couldn't Maria go to prom?

She had no Juan to go with!

I had to pay a lot for a limo to get to prom...

It was a bit of a stretch!

What did the student say when she got to prom?

'Hi, school!'

What would you call a French fan of anime?

A Ouib!

What’s a birds favourite anime film?

Owls moving Castle!

What do you call a witch who delivers vegetables?

Leaky’s Delivery Service!

What kind of shoes does Naruto wear?

Sneakers!

Why did Naruto go to college?

He wanted to be a ninja-neer!

Why can’t Naruto watch scary movies?

He’s too sensei-tive!

What do you call an old Avatar?

Boomer-Aang!

How did the Avatar feel when he saw what happened to the Air Nomads?

Aangry!

What does toilet paper and the Avatar have in common?

They disappear when the world needs them most!

A man holding lots of toilet rolls

Why was the Fire Lord afraid of the Avatar?

Because he had Aangxiety!

How does Piccolo relax?

He goes to Planet Hammock.

When Gohan’s in trouble…

He feels like he is in a right Picollo!

Why did Goku tell the teacher on Vegeta?

Because he was Saiyan stuff about him!

What do Dragon Ball Saiyans wear at the pool?

Trunks!

How many ‘Dragon Ball Z’ characters does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But it will take 6 episodes!

The creators of Haikyu sued a rival show for plagurism!

It was a court case!

Did you hear about the new Haikyu character who just stands in the middle of the volleyball court?

She’s called Annette!

In anime, what is served but never eaten?

A volleyball in Haikyu!

What does a carpenter have in common with a Haikyu character?

They both like to hammer spikes!

Did you hear about the japanese cartoon about old ladies?

A Granimae!

Did you hear about the anime about nuts?

It’s called My Hero Macadamia!

What is a type of car do little sister’s drive in anime?

A Nii-san!

What language is spoken in anime?

Manganese!

No-one mentions Geodudes bum…

That would be rock bottom!

Why is Tokyo Ghoul gonna get you?

Because you Ken-run, but you Ken-not hide!

Did you hear about the football anime?

It’s called Tokyo Ghoulkeeper!

What is the best chocolate snack to eat while watching anime?

My neighbours Toblerone! 

The weather in Digimon Adventure is…

Snow Joke!

Did you hear about the cow anime?

It’s called Sailor Moo!

How do you get Pikachu on a bus?

You Poke-em-on!

What sort of coffee does Thomas drink?

Expresso!

What happens when Thomas eats?

He chew-chews!

Do you know where Thomas is?

It's hard to keep track!

What sort of shoes does Thomas wear?

Platforms!

Why was Thomas so confident?

He had high self-eSTEAM!

Did you hear that Thomas used to be a reporter?

He's an ex-press train!

Where does Thomas go to find out how much he weighs?

The weighting room!

How do you find Thomas if he gets lost?

Follow the tracks!

Why did Thomas camouflage himself?

He wanted to cover his tracks!

Why was Thomas confused?

He'd lost his train of thought!

Why can't the Fat Controller get electrocuted?

Because he's not a conductor!

How does Thomas hear?

Through his engin-ears!

Why was Thomas only going 5mph?

He's a slowcomotive!

What did Thomas say when Gordon helped him out of a ditch?

Tank you!

What do you call Thomas when he has a cold?

Achoo-choo train!

What do you get when you cross a Tram Engine and Shakespeare?

Toby, or not Toby, that is the question

Why is Thomas such a quick thinker?

He has real engine-uity!

What did Thomas do on Halloween?

He ran a skeleton service!

What is Thomas' favourite Olympic event?

Track!

Why was Thomas sad?

His day had gone off the rails!

Where does Tarzan charge his phone?

The power plant!

What happened when Tarzan had to change banks?

He had to switch branches!

What is Tarzan's favourite month?

Ape-ril!

If you share an Amazon account with Tarzan...

You become Prime mates!

Why didn't Tarzan want a pet giraffe?

It was too high maintenance!

How does Tarzan get online?

He logs on!

What does Tarzan bring to a party?

Chimps and dips!

What does Tarzan wear when he's cooking?

An ape-ron!

Did you hear that rumour about Tarzan?

I heard it on the ape vine!

What happened when Tarzan went to the Olympics?

He was the chimpion!

What does Tarzan wear when he goes swimming?

Elephant trunks!

Who stole Tarzan's phone?

A crook-o-dile!

What does Tarzan drive?

A furrari!

Why doesn't Tarzan trust big cats?

They're always lion!

Where does Tarzan like to hang out?

Monkey bars!

What do you call Tarzan when he's playing on the monkey bars?

Jungle Jim!

Why didn't Tarzan answer Jane's call?

His vine was busy!

Why does Tarzan spend so much time playing golf?

He's perfecting his swing!

What is Tarzan's favourite Christmas song?

Jungle Bells!

Why doesn't Tarzan play cards in the jungle?

Too many cheetahs!

Why did the ruler meet his mum at the airport?

He was centimetre!

Where can you buy a three foot long ruler?

At a yard sale!

How do you get straight As at school?

Use a ruler!

How do you get straight As at school?

Use a ruler!

I don’t mind jokes about stationery… 

but rulers are where I draw the line.

What happened when they used a ruler to work out what size shoes lion take?

There was some lengthy paws!

How big is your backgarden?

It’s only a yard!

A pug in a grassy garden

How long is a crab?

A couple of pinches!

A crab at Blackpool beach

The ruler did something awful…

But we should draw a line under it!

Mum: Why is there ruler in your bed? 

Kid: To see how long I sleep!

Why is a snail like a 12inch rule?

It’s only got one foot!

How does Thor measure the distance to Valhalla?

With a thundl wheel!

Shopper: Do you keep stationery?

Shopkeeper: Actually, I move around quite a bit!
 

What did the ruler say to the protractor?

What’s your angle?

How do rulers greets each other?

Pleased to metre!

Did you hear about the spider who climbed up a ruler?

Inchy wincey spider?

Did you hear about the man who invented the 100m ruler?

He went to great lengths!

How do you measure an evil wizard?

With a Snape Measure!

A dog witch

Did you hear about the King of Traffic Wardens?

He was a metre ruler!

The joke police

Did you hear about the 12 inch Prince?

He made a great ruler!

What do you get if you cross a pirate with Animal Crossing?

Captain Nook!

What sort of phones do they have in Animal Crossing?

Nookia!

Why did the chicken cross the road?

To play Animal Crossing!

I can't find my Nintendo Switch..

I've searched every Nook and cranny!

What should you listen to when you're fishing in Animal Crossing?

Something catchy!

Animal Crossing puns...

They leave me in Stitches!

Tell me your Animal Crossing jokes

I won't make Fauna you!

I've decided to stop playing Animal Crossing...

I'm turning over a New Leaf!

What do you call Iggly at the North Pole?

Lost!

Why is Blathers always around in the morning?

He likes to get up owly!

Why did Thumper like Bambi?

He was his dear friend!

What do you call Bambi wearing a blindfold?

No-eye dear!

They’re making a sequel where Bambi gets revenge

It’s called Bambo!

What did Bambi say after being cloned countless times?

I feel like a million bucks!

What do you get if you cross Bambi and a ghost?

Bamboo!

A ghost floating against a pink background

What do you call Bambi with hooves in his ears?

Anything you want — he can’t hear you!

How did the hunter miss Bambi?

He wasn’t aiming deerectly for him!

Who puts money under Bambi’s pillow?

The hoof fairy!

What does Bambi call hunters?

Doe foes!

Who did Bambi invite to his birthday party?

His nearest and deer-est friends!

What’s a buck’s least favorite type of bread?

Sour doe!

How does Bambi cure an upset stomach?

Elka Seltzer!

Bambi is my favourite movie

I’m very fawned of it!

How does Bambi clean his feet?

Hoof paste!

Why did Bambi cross the road?

To prove he wasn’t chicken!

What’s Bambi’s favourite thing to read?

Stagazines!

Two reindeers

Why didn’t Bambi go on holidays!

The flights were too deer!

What did Bambi get braces?

He had buck teeth!

What do you call Bambi in outer space?

Star bucks! 

What do you call a deer that can write with both hands?

Bambi-dextrous!

What did Aquaman say when he ate a clownfish?

That tasted a bit funny!

Who is Aquaman’s nemesis?

Charles, Prince of Wales!

Why is Aquaman such a good superhero?

Because he was born with a sense of porpoise!

Iron Man never got along with Aquaman

He has rust issues!

What would Liam Neeson say to Aquaman?

"I've got a particular set of gills"!

How does Aquaman get his news?

He streams it on BBSea!

What did Aquaman say to Mera when she got new shoes?

Water those!?

What do you call Aquaman going to the cinema with his girlfriend?

Liquidating!

What did Aquaman say when he got dumped?

There's plenty more fish in the sea!

What do you call Aquaman fighting crime in Antarctica?

Justice!

Woah, is Aquaman running after your gardener?

No, he's Jason Mamoa!

What martial art Aquaman learnt in Atlantis?

Crab Magá!

Where would Aquaman live if not Atlantis?

Finland!

 Why did Aquaman join the DC universe instead of Marvel?

Because he was hydra-phobic!

How was Aquaman's son delivered?

Via SEA-section!

What does Aquaman put in his beverages?

Just ice!

What is Aquaman's favorite color?

Aquamarine!

What is Aquaman's favourite fruit?

Watermelons!

What are Aquaman's assistants?

Mermaids!

How does Aquaman talk to fish?

He drops them a line!

What’s wrong with Minnie Mouse’s helicopter?

Disneyland!

Why did Minnie join NASA?

To find Pluto!

Minnie kept cracking up…

She was clearly a-moused!

Now Minnie’s famous she always stays in somewhere posh… 

Like the Stilton!

What did Micky say to Minnie ? 

It’s so mice to meet you!

Dormouse

What did Minnie say when Micky broke a tooth?

Hard cheese?

What do mice do in December? 

They give Chris-mouse cards!

What’s Minnie Mouse’s favourite game? 

Hide and squeak!

Do you know what Minnie’s favourite instrument is? 

The mouse-organ!

Why did Minnie Mouse get custard pied ?

Because Donald ducked!

Donald Duck Jokes

Doctor, Doctor, I think I’m Minnie Mouse!

“How long have you been having these Disney spells?”

Did you know Minnie mouse can play the violin?

She’s a real mice-tro!

Minnie mouse is so famous she goes to the shops in disguise! 

She’s completely anony-mouse.

Disney couldn’t decide between the name Mindy and Ginnie…

In the end it was a compro-mice!

How do Micky and Minnie share secrets?  

By Mouse Code!

Did you hear that Minnie Mouse has a sword? 

She’s a Mouseketeer!

How did Minnie get so good at being tiny?

She learnt at minnie-school!

Minnie Mouse was arrested for identity theft!

She was charged with being Goofy.

What’s Minnie’s favourite car?

Work it out!

What happens when Minnie spins around?

She’s a little Disney!

What’s Minnies favourite cheese?

Mouserella!

What did Minnie say when her boyfirend was arrested?

You’re taking the Mickey!

Did you hear about when the Beast took Mrs Potts to the highest tower to help with his Maths homework?

He need to see the high-pot-in-use!  

Cogsworth was hungry…

So he went back four seconds!

Why did the Beast throw Cogsworth from the castle?

He wanted to see time fly!

Did you hear there’s a Beauty and the Beast spin-off starring Cogsworth?

It’s about time! 

When Lumiere finally got to have a bath…

He was de-lighted!

Lumiere: I hate it when Mrs Potts pours tea carelessly…

It really gets on my wick!

Lumiere searched google for how to set his hands on fire…

No matches found!

Can you shed some light on the subject, Lumiere?

Yes I candle!

What did Mrs Potts say when the Beast turned into a Prince?

Let’s get this Par-tea started!

This joke about Mrs Potts…

Will cause Hilari-tea!

These Mrs Potts jokes…

Sure are teadious!

How did you get in my house, Beast?

Door, Belle!

What’s that you’re eating, Beast?

Taco, Belle!

What did Gaston sing when the Beast and Belle broke up?

Single Belle, Single Belle, single all the way!

How does the Beast summon Beauty? 

With a Belle button!

How did the Prince from Beauty and the Beast find his son in a snowstorm?

The fresh prints of Belle’s heir!

The costumes in the live action Beauty and Beast were very old fashioned…

Tailors old as time!

Did you hear that the Beast ate Cogsworth?

It was quite time consuming!

Why was Hermione Grainger cast in Beauty and the Beast?

Because the Beast is really Harry!

What's was only prize that Gaston won in Beauty and the Beast?

The No Belle prize!

Why was Ariel worried about her fish friend?

He was floundering!

How do you weigh the Little Mermaid?

You use her scales!

What sort of pictures does Ariel take?

Shellfies!

Where does Ariel sleep?

On a water bed!

Why doesn't Ariel play tennis?

She doesn't want to get caught in the net!

Where does Ariel keep her money?

In a river bank!

How do you keep in contact with the Little Mermaid?

Through C-mail!

What does the Little Mermaid eat with ice cream?

Jellyfish!

Why did Ariel blush?

Because the seaweed!

Why wasn't Sebastian speaking to Ariel?

He was feeling crabby!

What is Sebastian's favourite food?

Crab apples!

What happened when Sebastian went to the gym?

He pulled a mussel!

What happened when Ariel lost her fork?

She tried brushing her hair with a spoon, but it was pointless!

What did the sea say to Ariel?

Nothing, it just waved!

What do you call a photograph of a mermaid taken from the sky?

Arial shots!

What is the Little Mermaid's favourite font?

Arial!

What did Ariel spot shivering at the bottom of the sea?

A nervous wreck!

Why did Ariel change her mind about becoming human?

She got cold feet!

Where does Ariel watch films?

At the dive-in!

Why doesn't Ariel go online?

She's scared of the net!

Why don't athletes ever get hot?

They have a lot of fans!

What's a Hungarian runner's favourite food?

Go-lash!

Why was the Marathon runner taken to jail?

He was resisting a rest!

What's an athlete's favourite country?

Iran!

What do you call an athlete that isn't that good?

A try-athlete!

I used to be a professional skier...

But it all went downhill!

Why don't athletes walk into bars?

Because they jump over them!

What do you call a joke about athletes?

A running gag!

If athletes get athlete's foot, what do astronauts get?

Mistletoe!

Relay runners...

You've got to hand it to them!

Why does Finland have such good runners?

Because they always Finnish first!

Why was the Marathon runner sad?

He'd suffered the agony of defeat!

Did you hear about the gardener who lost the race?

He took the wrong root!

Why are runners so bad at remembering things?

They always need to jog their memories!

Did you hear about the fish that ran the London marathon?

It came in last plaice!

Why did the snowman have to stop running?

He couldn't warm up!

Why was the DJ disqualified from the race?

She kept changing tracks!

Why should you only run during Lent or Ramadan?

Because that's when you fast!

What do you get if you run in front of a car?

Tired!

What do you get if you run behind a car?

Exhausted!

What did the pirate say when he turned 80?

Aye, matey!

What did the mime say to the audience?

Nothing. He's a mime!

What did the tomato say to the other tomato during a race?

Come on, ketchup!

What did the rock drummer call his twin daughters?

Anna one, Anna two!

What did the buffalo say when his son left for school?

Bison!

What did the finger say to the thumb? 

I'm in glove with you!

What did the big flower say to the little flower?

Hey, bud!

What did the clock do when it was peckish?

 It went back four seconds!

What did the rabbit say to the carrot?

It’s been nice gnawing you!

What did the lift say when it sneezed?

I think I’m coming down with something!

What is a goalkeeper's least favourite drink?

Penaltea!

A diving goalkeeper

Which FIFA player always leaves their kit lying on the floor?

Messi!

How do football players keep cool at the World Cup?

They stand close to the fans!

What do you call an angry Batgirl?

Batgrrl!

What position did Barbara Gordon play in the cricket team!

She was the bat-girl.

Knock, knock. Who’s there? Dishes. Dishes who?

Dishes the police, open up!

Knock, knock! Who's there? Luke. Luke who?

Luke through the spy hole and find out!

Knock, knock! Who’s there? Candice. Candice who?

Candice joke get any worse?

Knock, knock. Who’s there? Anita. Anita who?

Anita wee so please let me in!

Knock, knock! Who’s there? Cereal. Cereal who?

Cereal pleasure to meet you!

Knock, knock! Who’s there? Ice cream. Ice cream who?

Ice cream if you don’t let me in the door!

Knock! Knock! Who's there? Scold. Scold who?

Scold outside, let me in!

Knock, knock! Who’s there? Figs. Figs who?

Figs the doorbell, it’s not working!

Knock, knock! Who's there? Tank. Tank who?

Hey, you’re welcome!

How does Batman contact Batgirl?

With his batmobile!

Knock Knock Who’s there? Eggs. Eggs who?

Eggs-cuse me, could you open the door?

What do Batman and Batgirl do together?

Just hang around!

What is Batgirl’s most useful skill?

Aerobatics!

How do you spell Batgirl Backwards?

B-A-T-G-I-R-L-B-A-C-K-W-A-R-D-S

What did Batman say to Batgirl at the airport arrivals lounge?

Welcome Bat!

How do you get batgirl to help solve a crime?

Comission a Gordon!

Why is batgirl so scruffy?

She doesn’t like The Mirror!

How does Batgirl order a bigmac?

Could I have a bigmac?

How does Batgirl order a sandwich?

Got-ham?

How does Batgirl flip a pancake?

With a batula!

How does Batgirl power her batmobile?

With batteries!

Why didn’t Batgirl flush the toilet?

Because it was Batman’s duty! 

How many bat-based superheroes does it take to change a light-bulb?

None. They like the dark!

Why did Batgirl clean her teeth?

Because she had BAT breath! 

What did Batgirl wear to the prom?

Her Dark Knight gown!

Who do you think is the best businessperson: Batgirl or Superman?

 Superman. There aren't any bat-markets!


Why doesn’t Batgirl play cards?

Because she always gets the Joker!

What does Batgirl have in common with false teeth?

They only come out at night!

Stanley Pine’s so scruffy!

He needs to spruce himself up!

What’s Dipper’s favourite fruit?

A pineapple!

Why are the Pines so bad at sewing?

The always drop their needles! 

A handful of pine cones

What’s Waddles’ favourite arcade at the Mystery Fair?

The Slop Machines!

Why did the kid from Gravity falls order ketchup with his fries?

He’s Dipper!

Why is Disney+ so serious?

It delivers things with Gravity (Falls)!

Why was Isacc Newton watching TV?

He discovered Gravity Falls!

Soos walks into the Mystery Shack…

Ouch!

Did you know that the mystery shack is held up with string?

I’ve got to say… It really ties the room together!

How many listens does Mabel’s favourite Boyband get?

Sev'ral Timez

Knock, knock! Who's there? Mabel! Mabel who?

Mabel doesn't work!

Knock, knock! Who’s there? Wendy. Wendy who?

Wendy bell works again I won’t have to knock anymore!

What does Jesus Ramirez do when someone slanders him?

He Soos!

What’s a weasals favourite ride at the Grunkle Stan’s Mystery fair?

The Ferrets Wheel!

What happens when Grunkle Stan lost his dog?

Stanley pines