290 Word Jokes That Are So Punny!

What do you call a Super Saiyan who doesn't eat meat?

Vegeta-rians!

What did Vegeta say when he got his tuition bill?

"It's over 9000!"

Knock Knock. Who's there? Dragon Ball Z. Dragon Ball Z Who?

FIND OUT NEXT TIME ON DRAGON BALL Z!

What is a quote by Goku called?

A Super Saiyan!

I tried changing my password to "Goku"

But apparently it was too weak!

Why does Goku wear light blue?

Because he’s a cyan!

You know a leprechaun rapper joined Dragonball Z

Gnome Saiyan?

What does a Super Saiyan always put on his sandwich?

Ka-Mayomayo!

What's a Dragon Ball fan's favourite food?

Vegeta-bles!

Who is Gordon Ramsay's least favourite Dragon Ball character?

Frieza!

I wanted to change my name to Dragon Ball Z. My friend said, "Wow, that's a lot of papers you have to fill out!"

I said "Yeah, this isn't even my final form!"

What’s Gohan’s favourite subject in school?

Cell-gebra!

Dragon Ball fans are like creationists

If you talk about Evolution, they get mad!

What does Goku say when he answers the phone?

“Cell-o?”

Did you know Frieza wasn't very popular in school?

His brother was cooler!

What is Goku's favourite instrument of destruction?

A Piccolo!

I don't find Dragon Ball Z jokes funny...

Just Saiyan!

How many Super Saiyans does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, but it will take him five episodes!

Where does Vegeta keep his leftovers?

In the Frieza!

What is Vegeta's favourite color?

Cyan!

Why is Ariana Grande so good at sports?

Dunno, but she's always Victorious!

What does Ariana Grande do at the end of the evening?

Say Goodnight and Go!

Have you heard about Ariana Grande's new film?

It's Wicked!

Do you want to hear the jokes about Ariana Grande's improv troupe?

Yes, and?

How many times do you have to call Ariana Grande?

You have to do at least 7 rings!

I want to tell you an Ariana Grande joke...

But why try?

What does Ariana Grande say when she's working at the checkout?

Thank u, next!

What does Ariana Grande want to be when she grows up?

Ariana Venti!

What do popstars order at Starbucks?

An Ariana Grande!

How many times does Ariana Grande knock on the door?

She doesn't, she just gives 7 rings!

What should you say to Ariana Grande on Feb 14th?

Will you be my Cat Valentine?

Where does Ariana Grande live?

In A flat!

Why does Ariana Grande always have a suitcase with her?

So she can carry a tune!

What happened when Ariana Grande forgot the lyrics?

She was in treble!

Why did Ariana climb a ladder?

She wanted to reach the high notes!

Why did Ariana Grande keep banging her head on the piano keys?

She was playing by ear!

What does Ariana Grande say when she buys her clothes from a high street store?

Thank you, Next!

Why can't Ariana listen to her own music?

She's broken too many records!

What is Ariana Grande's favourite game?

Monopoly!

Why is Ariana Grande better at singing when she's in a boat?

Because she hits the high seas!

What's Rocky's favourite treat?

Rocky Road!

Why should you watch Chicken Run?

Because its egg-cellent!

Why was Babs so shy?

She wasn't ready to come out of her shell!

What movies does Ginger watch?

Chick flicks!

What do you call a Scottish chicken who's really tall?

a Big Mac!

Where do you weigh a chicken pie?

Somewhere over the rainbow, weigh a pie!

Why did the chickens have to stop playing football?

Too many fowls!

How did Fowler do in the RAF exams?

He passed with flying colours!

Why did the chicken run smell bad?

Don't know, but it was a fowl odour!

Rocky's so great...

He's really fly!

How does Ginger wake up in the morning?

With an alarm cluck!

How does Babs dry her eyes?

With a hen-kerchief!

Where does Babs go on holiday?

To the chick-inn!

Why did Ginger cross the yard?

To get to the other side (of the fence!)

What's so good about Mrs. Tweedy's pies?

They're very cheep!

How does Bunty send post?

In a hen-velope!

What did the chickens do when they wanted to hide?

They laid low!

Why was Ginger so upset?

She was having an egg-istential crisis!

What's Ginger's favourite film?

Lord of the Wings!

Why was Ginger suspicious of Rocky?

She suspected fowl play!

What does Dr Colosso wear on his finger?

A 14 carrot ring!

Dr Colosso’s plans were foiled again

He’s hopping mad!

Phoebe wants to be a lawyer

To get power of attorney!

What’s invisible and smells like carrots?

Dr Colosso’s farts!

Hank is really good at organising things

They call him Captain Plan-It!

What’s Dr Colosso’s favourite music?

Hip hop!

Max tried to steal all the world’s aluminium

But his plan was foiled!

Max has been pinching lots of expensive superhero gadgets

He’s a man of steal!

Dr Colosso has invented a giant robot

It’s called Hop-timus Prime!

Why doesn’t Max need a boss?

He already has supervision!

Where in the US is Hank from originally?

DC!

Max will never go to space

He’s Galactose intolerant!

How does Hank fix stuff around the house?

With Superglue!

Max has an evil plan to make everyone’s hair red

It’s dye-a-follicle!

Max has invented an evil calendar

Your days are numbered!

Dr Colosso has got into glass blowing

He’s made the most vial creations!

Where do Max and Dr Colosso buy their supervillain groceries?

Volde Mart!

Barb’s bread is delicious

She’s the hero we kneaded!

What does Barb put in her drinks in summer?

Just Ice.

Where do the Thundermans go on holiday?

Cape Town!

What is TWICE’s favourite song by Girls’ Generation?

GEEHyo!

How do TWICE watch films?

With their Eyes Wide Open!

What do TWICE do when something goes well?

Celebrate!

What is a ONCE’s favourite drink?

Anything as long as it’s Alcohol-Free!

What will a ONCE say when you ask if they want seconds at dinner?

“Yes, MORE & MORE!”

What is Tzuyu’s favourite kind of sweet?

Chewy!

What would a TWICE member wear if they were engaged?

A Momoring!

What is TWICE’s favourite vegetable?

Minari!

Why should you always treat a ONCE like royalty?

Because they like to Feel Special!

What did Nayeon say to the sad infant?

“Cheer Up, baby!”

What does a ONCE want to be when they grow up?

A Scientist!

What does a ONCE say when they get arrested?

Set Me Free!

What did TWICE see when they went on a drive in the country?

Hare, hare!

What is a ONCE’S favourite car?

An Audi TT!

Are you ONCE?

Cos you Mina the world to me!

Why do TWICE make the greatest friends?

They got you!

What are TWICE’s favourite kind of jokes?

KNOCK-KNOCK jokes!

How do TWICE light a candle?

With One Spark!

What did the music teacher say to the science teacher?

“You say we can’t live without the sun… I say we can’t live without Sana!”

What is a ONCE’s favourite Bond film?

You Only Live TWICE!

Why is Harry always so horrible?

He's Greene with envy!

Did the gang enjoy their trip to Paris?

They had an in-Seine-ly good time!

Can Nick speak French?

Yes, he's Eiffel Ly good at it!

Why does Nick love baking?

He kneads a hobby!

What's Charlie's favourite season?

Spring!

What happens when Charlie stops himself breaking wind?

He's a fartstopper!

Why does Charlie love playing the drums?

They're hard to beat!

Hey Charlie, do you like jokes about Ancient Greece?

Olive them!

Why doesn't Nick like rugby jokes?

Because once you've seen one, you've seen a maul!

If the cast were pigs, what school would they go to?

Tru-ham Grammer!

Where does Nick buy his rugby kit?

New Jersey!

Nick isn't that good at rugby...

But at least he tried!

How does Elle feel about the Mona Lisa?

She thinks she was framed!

What's Nick's favourite element?

Iron, Man!

Why did Nick go and see Dracula on Saturday?

He wanted a Vampire Weekend!

Did Charlie and Nick enjoy their time in Paris?

They Louvre-d it!

What do you call it when Charlie and Nick skip maths class?

Chartstoppers!

If Nick was an animal, what would he be?

A Rug-bee!

How did Nick and Charlie become burglars?

They stole each others hearts!

Why is Tao so bad at art?

His skills are a bit sketchy!

Why does Crainer love the new Minecraft update?

It’s ground-breaking!

Crainer loves the outdoors

Today he spent 4 hours on his Roblox farm!

I made fun of Crainer’s Minecraft skills online

He blocked me!

Why do Crainer’s fans all love his kid-friendly Minecraft memes?

Because they’re minors!

Where is Crainer’s favourite place to play Minecraft?

The Netherlands!

Crainer is making a Minecraft movie

It’s gonna be a blockbuster!

What is Crainer’s favourite type of music?

Bed-rock and roll!

How does Crainer avoid sunburn in Minecraft?

He uses sun-block!

How did Crainer celebrate his birthday?

With a block party!

What did Crainer say to his girlfriend?

I dig you!

How does Crainer measure his shoe size?

In square feet!

Why do some people dislike Crainer’s Minecraft content?

They think he’s square!

Crainer won that Minecraft game without cheating

He did it fair and cube!

Why did Crainer need mouthwash after destroying the mobs?

Because he had bat breath!

What’s Crainer’s favourite sport?

Boxing!

Why can't you beat Crainer at basketball?

Because they are always blocking!

How did Crainer make the skeleton laugh?

He tickled its funny bone!

I couldn’t watch Crainer’s videos about cats

Turns out they were just on paws!

Where does Crainer sleep?

On his bed-rock!

How does Crainer stay fit?

He jogs around the block!

How did St. George search the land for the dragon?

He did a geographical sir-vey!

What do you call St. George’s taxes?

A sir charge!

What did St. George say when he was executed?

“I’ll beheading off now!”

Why did St. George wear a jacket with an octopus on it?

It was his coat of arms!

Did you know that the dragon wasn’t expecting to be defeated by a brave knight?

I guess you could call it a Sir Prise!

How did the dragon see in the dark?

With knight-vision goggles!

Why did St. George want the dragon to join his rock band?

He really knew his scales!

How do we know that St. George lived in the Dark Ages?

Because there were so many knights!

Did you know that another knight went with St. George to fight the dragon?

His name? Sir Plus!

Why didn’t the dragon eat St. George?

He was sick of canned food!

What is St. George’s favourite tabletop game?

Dungeons and Dragons!

When did St. George go to sleep?

Knight time!

How often does the dragon eat people?

Knightly!

What’s the worst part about St. George’s Day?

It can really dragon!

How old is St. George?

Middle-aged!

Did you know that St. George is afraid of the dark?

He has to use a knight light!

What happened when St. George got discombobulated and lost all his weapons?

He was out of swords!

How did St. George weigh the dragon?

He used its scales!

What’s the best thing about England?

Well, the flag is a big plus!

Why is St. George so smart?

He goes to knight school!

I used to work in shoe recycling...

It was sole destroying!

I quit my job at the recycling plant because I was so bad at it

I can't believe I threw it all away

I really want to start a business that helps recycle chewing gum

But I'm having a hard time getting it off the ground

Which army officer hates recycling?

General Waste!

Why did the can crusher quit their job?

It was soda pressing!

When should you recycle your batteries?

When its free of charge!

I would tell you the joke about recycling...

But you've probably heard it before!

Why are recycling jokes the best?

They're not rubbish puns!

What was wrong with the bottle bank?

It was feeling shattered!

How did the can feel after it was recycled?

Crushed!

I love recycling...

It's bin-credible!

Why should you never listen to a recycling bin?

They're always trash talking!

What do you call it if you use a bike more than once?

Re-cycling!

What did the recycled bottle say to the recycled can?

'We were made for each other!'

Why does Kermit always recycle?

Because he's green!

How do you make sure you're recycling the right way?

You planet!

I wouldn't bother entering the recycling competition...

It's a waste of time!

Why should you never eat your rubbish?

So you aren't waste-ful!

Why are people who recycle so positive?

They have a can-do attitude!

I don't want to recycle!

I refuse!

What do you call Beta Squad’s older brothers?

Alpha squad!

Who checks to see if the Beta squad’s jokes are funny?

The Beta tester!

What does Niko call his girlfriend?

His beta half!

Which one of the beta squad is going into debt collection?

Loan Sharky!

Why are Chunkz and Niko better at making dinner than the Sidemen?

They’re just beta cooks!

I’m not seeing any of the squad’s videos on Youtube any more

Must be the beta-blockers!

How much RAM does Sharky’s computer have?

A killer-bite!

Did you hear about Chunkz’ new gold necklace?

It’s au-fully heavy!

What is the Beta Squad’s favourite type of food?

Anything with chunks in!

Did you hear Niko got hit by lightning?

What happened next might shock you!

The Beta Squad are really happy with life

They’re content creators!

Why are the beta squad so good at farming sheep?

Because they’re used to milking their followers!

Which evil spirit are the Beta Squad most scared of?

Demonitisation!

How do the Beta Squad get into swimming pools?

They just jump into it!

Niko lost at a Try Not To Laugh Challenge

He fought the LOL and the LOL won!

Beta Squad started a hotel, and then an Airbnb

Sounds like a big change, but was entirely inn keeping!

The Beta Squad just broke up because of an argument about video games

What a stupid thing to Fallout 4!

The Beta Squad did a video about their shoes yesterday

It was some pretty good footage!

Have you seen the Beta Squad’s new video about baking as fast as possible?

It’s called Knead for Speed!

The Beta Squad only make videos in 4k now

It’s their New Year’s resolution!

Why did Alexander Hamilton have a hammer and screwdriver?

He heard the President was assembling a cabinet!

Which Hamilton star is good a making holes in the ground?

Daveed Diggs!

Which cat is a Founding Father?

Aaron Purr!

What did Alexander Hamilton say when the Founding Fathers were on the floor?

"What’ll you fall for?"

What did King George say when it was time to sing in church?

"I know hymn!"

What did George Washington say when he felt chilly?

"History has its ice on me!"

What do you call a Founding Father who wins a trophy?

Alexander Champion!

What do you call a Founding Father who doesn't know the words?

Alexander Hum-ilton!

Which Founding Father always closed doors with a bang?

Alexander Slamilton!

Why did Alexander Hamilton refuse to put his tissues in the bin?

He wasn't throwing away his snot!

Which Founding Father was always covered in salt?

La-fry-ette!

What did Alexander Hamilton say to his bread dough while it was in the oven?

Rise up!

Why did Alexander Hamilton bring a pencil to the duel?

He wanted to draw first!

Why did Alexander Hamilton's roast chicken not taste of anything?

He had ran out of thyme!

What do you call a president that has lots of laundry to do?

George Washing-ton!

What did Alexander Hamilton say when he burned his stew?

"I'm not throwing away my pot!"

What do you call a Founding Father of the USA who lives in a shop?

Alexander Mannequin!

I told my wife I thought Jay-Z was the best hip-hop musician of all time…

She said, “That’s Ludacris!”

Why do fishermen make such good hip-hop artists?

Their lines are great, and their hooks are even better!

What does Willy Wonka bring to a rap battle?

Candy bars!

What is a sloth’s favourite hip-hop star?

Lay-Z!

What is a hip-hop star’s favourite toy?

A yoyo!

Why did the teenage hip-hop artist do a whole album about soap?

So the lyrics would be clean!

What does a hip-hop star like in his drinks?

Ice ice baby!

What does a hip-hop star do at the gym?

A Lil Pump!

What do hip-hop artists add to their coffee?

Tupac of sugar!

What do hip-hop artists and vegans have in common?

Fake beef!

What do say about a hip-hop star who stole a dictionary?

He's got a way with words!

What do you call a hip-hop star who smells amazing?

Post Cologne!

Why did the hip-hop musician go to M&S Simply Food?

He heard they had fresh beets!

Why are organic farmers such good hip-hop artists?

They make such good beets!

What is a chiropractor’s favourite kind of music?

Hip-hop!

What was Albert Einstein’s hip-hop alias?

MC Squared!

Dr Dre may not be a real doctor…

But he’s done a lot of hip-hoperations!

What do frogs and rabbits have in common?

They both love hip-hop!

My rap name is DJ Green Onion…

But my friends call me Rapscallion!

What do you call a hip hop song that samples Queen?

Bohemian Rap City!

Why is Alexander Hamilton banned from all-you-can-eat buffets?

Because he will never be satisfied!

Who's the coldest person in the Hamilton story?

Aaron Brrrr!

What do you call an argument between Alexander Hamilton and Aaron Burr?

The Ham-Burr-Grrr!

What do you get if you mix a team sport and a renowned British actress?

Patricia Hodge-ball!

What game does Rodger the Dodger like the most?

Rodge Dodge ball!

What game do you play in a cabin?

Lodge-ball!

Why don't grasshoppers play dodgeball?

They prefer cricket!

Why did the dodgeball coach bring pencils and paper to a dodgeball game?

He was hoping for a draw!

What sport can you play at the fairground?

Dodgem-ball!

What sport do you play outdoors?

Hedge-ball!

What do you get if you cross a meme and a sport?

Doge-ball!

Why was Cinderella so good at dodgeball?

She kept running away from the ball!

Why do kings play dodgeball?

Because they rule the court!

What's a Labrador's favourite sport?

Dog-ball!

What's a goalie's favourite movie?

Dodgeball!

Why was Cinderella so bad at dodgeball?

Because her coach was a pumpkin!

I'm bad at dodgeball...

I'll put my hands up and admit it!

Why was the chicken so bad at dodgeball?

It kept committing fowls!

What lights up a gym hall?

A dodgeball MATCH!

Why did the small ghost join the dodgeball team?

They needed a little team spirit!

Where do dodgeball players go to dance?

The dodge-ball!

Why did the dodgeball quit?

It was tired of being pushed around!

Why are dodgeball games always so cool?

The hall is full of fans!

I once got in a rap battle with a peanut!

He was roasted!

What does a rapping goat call their verbal drum skills?

Bleat boxing!

There really should be a subgenre of hip-hop called Bubble Rap

It would probably sound a lot like pop!

Macaulay Culkin just released his first rap album

He's Home Malone!

What do mumble rappers from the East coast rap about?

I don’t know... Their verses aren’t Pacific!

If the rap god and rap devil are fighting

Does that mean we all missed the rapture?

Rap is like scissors...

It always loses to rock!

What do you call a fish who raps?

Swim Shady!

What kind of snake is best at Rap?

The Spittin' Cobra!

What mumble rap group was also famous for their singing?

The Do-Re-Migos!

Isn't it strange how a random 80s rap song will start playing in your head for no reason?

I guess it’s because it's like that, and that's the way it is.

What music genre do rap-loving cops listen to?

Hip-hocrisy!

Did you hear about that rap group that got arrested?

They've been charged with serious rhymes!

There are two eras of modern rap...

Pre Malone and Post Malone!

I think I broke my phone's speaker! All I did was turn my normal rap playlist into an emo one

Now all I can hear is a Lil Peep!

I made a rap song all about soap

It’s fine, the lyrics are clean!

I was going to make a joke about mumble rap

But you wouldn’t understand it!

Why are dragons so good at rapping?

Because they're always spitting fire!

I can't focus on my work because someone is rapping about me

I've been diss track-ted!

Someone stole a few of my Rap CDs

Oh well, no biggie! 

How do pair figure skaters travel to their competitions?

On an icicle made for two!

How can you tell one ice skater apart from another?

Glacial recognition technology!

How do professional ice skaters make friends?

They have to break the ice first!

How do ice skaters stay cool?

They sit near the fans!

Why did the snake sign up for ice skating lessons?

To learn the serpentine lift!

Who is a figure skater’s favourite member of Guns N Roses?

Axel Rose!

Why is Cinderella such a bad ice skater?

She always loses a skate!

Why do competitive skaters like to work in bakeries when they retire?

They’re great at icing!

Why did the competitive skater feel sick?

She 8 a lot!

I tried ice skating on a lake, but I just fell in. No one even tried to help me, they just laughed!

Worst summer holiday!

Did you hear about the psychic named Claire who fell through the ice when she was skating on a frozen pond?

Luckily, Claire’s buoyant!

Wife: Have you seen the dog bowl?

Husband: No, but he’s pretty good at ice skating!

No one laughed when I fell over ice skating…

But the ice sure cracked up!

What stops you from getting into ice skating?

If you keep getting cold feet!

Why do hipsters hate ice skating?

They couldn’t do it before it was cool!

What do a dentist and an ice skating coach have in common?

They both use drills!

Did you hear that Nathan Chen won a gold medal at the Olympics?

He scored a perfect Chen out of Chen!

How do you know you’re a figure skater?

When you hear a new song, you’re working out the choreography in your head!

How is music like ice skating?

If you don’t C sharp you’ll B flat!

Why should you never tell jokes while ice skating?

Because the ice might crack up!