Skip to main content
Subscribe to our Beano comic! Click Here
Beano Comic

20 Parent Jokes That Will Make Your Whole Family Laugh!

Want to make your mum laugh - or even better, turn the tables on your dad with his dad jokes? These jokes are for you!

🤣
Beano Jokes Team
Last Updated:  August 19th 2024

Have you been a victim of constant dad jokes? Is your mum full of puns? Well, now it's YOUR turn to make them laugh, with these hilarious parent jokes! You're guaranteed to giggle at these jokes and puns - are you ready to become the funniest person in your house? Read on and laugh! And don't forget we've got SO many more jokes - try these prawn puns, swan jokes, and ladder laughs!

Silence is golden, unless you’re a parent…

Then silence is suspicious!

What did the baby panda give his mum?

A bear hug!

What hot drink helps parents relax?

Calm-omile tea!

Why did the baby biscuit cry?

Because its parents were a wafer so long!

Why was the computer so smart?

It always listened to its motherboard!

Dad: Why can’t I see your school report card?

Son: Oh, I lent it to my friend. He’s using it to scare his parents!

A man is washing a car with his son…

The son says, “Dad, why can’t you just use a sponge?”

What did the father buffalo say before he left for work?

"Bison!"

I have a lot of my dad’s genes…

They don't fit very well!

Why are giraffes such good parents?

They really give you someone to look up to!

My parents named me after my older brother…

And before my younger brother!

What three words solve every Dad’s problem?

"Ask your mother!"

What did the broom parents say to their broom daughter?

“It’s time to go to sweep!”

What did the spider parents say to their spider son?

“You spend too much time on the web!”

Why was it so hard for the pirate to call his parents?

They left the phone off the hook!

What did the baby corn say to the mother corn?

“Where’s pop-corn?”

What kind of flowers are best for Mother’s Day?

Chrysanthe-mums!

What do parents want for Christmas?

A silent night!

Why did the parent cross the playground?

To get to the other slide!

How do dads organise their jokes?

In a dad-a-base!

Trick or Treat?

Choose wisely...