Hello, it’s Sandra Menace here. I’m Bea’s mum! I thought I’d help Bea out as I’m not letting her anywhere near my laptop. Even when she’s just had a bath, she manages to get her hands covered in sticky food and if you know anything about computers, that spells danger for a laptop keyboard.
Her big brother Dennis is her absolute hero. Her most prized possession is one of his old catapults, but we keep that well out of reach. We can’t have her causing mayhem with that. It’s almost as big as she is. One day, she’ll work out how to reach it and we’ll all be in trouble!
When it comes to bedtimes, Bea always asks Dennis to read her a bedtime story, rather than me or her dad. I’m sure he tells her the best ways to cause mischief instead of reading any of the books she has on her bookshelf.
When I see Bea and Gnipper playing together, it reminds me of when Dennis was a toddler. She’s like a chip off the old block. She doesn’t like Walter Brown much, either, so she’s definitely a total Menace!
When she wants something and can’t be bothered to ask for it, she’ll wave her rattle around. If that hits you on the shin, you’ll know about it. I imagine it’s like what Thor was like when he was a baby wielding his first hammer.
Uh oh, I’ve just caught a whiff coming from Bea’s general direction. You know know what that means! Nasty nappy niffs! I’m just off to get her changing bag and a big clothes peg from the garden. It’s quite amazing how stinky a toddler can be. The smell is like a million cabbages which have been stored in a vat full of Brussels sprouts juice. Ew!
Bea Menace Fact File
Name: Beatrice Menace
Birthday: 8th August
Worst enemy: Walter Brown, the mayor’s son
Prized possessions: Her reinforced rattle (good for bashing stuff with) and an old catapult Dennis gave her
Motto: 'Me can do that!'
Super skill: She can fill her nappy on demand!
Address: 51 Gasworks Road, Beanotown
Fact: Bea's name was chosen by Beano readers!