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Halloween Make-up Jokes

You’ll smudge your Halloween make-up reading these eye-wateringly funny jokes!

Not enough? Don’t sweat it, we’ve got loads of monstrously funny Halloween, ghost or vampire jokes!

Why are zombies always hired as make-up artists?

halloween jokes

Because they have to put their face on every morning!

How do ghosts put foundation on?

They brush with death!

What do make-up artists say on Halloween?

Lipstick or treat!

How do you make a jack-o-lantern pretty?

Use pump-concealer!

Why do vampires never wear make-up?

Because they can’t see their reflection!

Why do mummies always look tired?

Because daughters always steal mummies make-up!

Why could the cyclops not stop crying?

halloween jokes

They had really good moistur-eyes-er!

Why couldn’t the wizard pick the right eyeliner?

They didn’t know witch to choose!

What’s a vampires favourite lipstick shade?

Blood red!

Why did the vampire need to get their make up on fleek?

Because there was a lot at stake!

What’s a magician’s favourite make-up?

Vanishing cream!

What kind of wand does a wizard use before a party?

A mascara wand!

The monster under my bed wouldn’t stop trying to sell me make-up…

Eyelashed out!

Why did the werewolf put lipstick on his head?

He was told to make-up his mind!

I once made a vampire blush…

But apparently vampires don’t wear make-up!

Why do vampires like make-up so much?

They’re always lurking in the eye shadows!

What’s a witch’s favourite make-up product?

Scream cream!

Why was the invisible man upset?

No one complimented his make over!

What’s a ghost’s favourite makeup product?


What kind of make-up do ghosts wear?


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