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10 Best Hocus Pocus Jokes for Halloween

These bewitchingly funny Hocus Pocus jokes will have you screaming with laughter!

Beano Jokes Team
Last Updated:  October 12th 2023

It's a classic Halloween movie, and there's an spook-tacular sequel to enjoy too! But did you know there are plenty of laughs to be had about Hocus Pocus that aren't in the movies? Just check out this howling list of Halloween laughs! But if these aren't enough to cure your hunger, you can always check out our HUGE list of other Halloween jokes! We've got spooky jokes, dracula jokes, halloween food jokes - and even zombie jokes! Arrgh!

Anyway, let's get back these wheeze-worthy witchcraft gags!

Winifred wrote a new spellbook, it took her years and is 10,000 pages long

It’s her magnum opus pocus!

Why do the Sanderson sisters always get away with it?

Because of a lack of witchnesses!

Why does Winifred drink smoothies?

Because they’re very newt-ritious!

Why couldn’t the witch write hocus pocus?

She was bad at spelling!

How does Winifred fly to Australia?

On a broomerang!

What spell do witches use when they want to concentrate?

Focus pocus!

How should you write “hocus pocus” in your spellbook?

In cursive!

How does Winifred keep her hair up?

With scare spray!

What is Sarah’s favourite makeup?


A witches hat

What did the witch in the gardening centre say?

Crocus pocus!

What did the President say to the trick or treaters on Halloween?