Sleep Jokes

Hopefully you won't drift off with our funny sleep jokes...

Don't drop off with our funny sleep jokes. These howlers are chosen to get you the opposite of yawning... so whatever that is, get on it with our jokes about dreams, beds and sleeping!

If you're hankering after more hilarious one-liners, head on over to our weird jokes page! 

Perhaps you'd like to sample our Monday morning jokes buffet or time-themed gag menu? It's really up to you.

What do you call a police officer when they're asleep in bed?

An undercovers cop!

How did the sheep get to sleep?

She counted her friends!

What do you call a tired woodcutter?

A slumberjack!

Why did the little boy take his bicycle to bed with him?

Because he didn't want to sleep walk!

Some people have difficulty sleeping...

But I can do it with my eyes shut!

What's huge and grey and sends people to sleep?

A hypno-potamus!

What should you do if you can't get to sleep?

Lie on the edge of the bed, you'll soon drop off!

What happened to the man when he fell asleep with his head under the pillow?

Fairies took all his teeth out!

What time do tennis players go to bed?


Why did the girl run around her bed?

She wanted to catch up on her sleep!

What do you call a sleeping bull?

A bulldozer!

Why did the man eat yeast and shoe polish before he went to bed?

So he could rise and shine!

Why do dragons sleep during the day?

So they can fight knights!

Where do fish sleep?

On the sea bed!

Did you hear the joke about the bed?

I haven't made it yet!

What should you do if you find a dinosaur in your bed ?

Find somewhere else to sleep!

Where do library books like to sleep?

Under their covers!

Why did the boy sprinkle sugar on his pillows?

He wanted to have sweet dreams!

What do butterflies sleep on?


What do you call a sleeping T-rex?

A dino-snore!


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