Skip to main content

Snail Jokes

You’re in for a good slime with these snail jokes!

These funny snail jokes will really bring you out of your shell!

If you liked these and fancy more nature-based antics, why not pitch up at our camping jokes page? And if you’re after more creepy crawly chuckles, we’ve got insect jokes too, as well as spider jokes for some 8 legged lols!

Want more? We’ve got loads more laughs on our jokes page, check them out!

Why did the snail cross the road?

A grinning brown snail

I’ll let you know when he gets here!

What do you call a snail who sails the seven seas?

A snailor!

What’s a snail’s favourite fruit?

Lemons and slimes!

What did the slug say to the snail?

I don’t suppose you’re selling your house?

Why did the snail get rid of his shell?

He was sick of hearing the sea wherever he went!

Did you hear what happened to the snail when he got trod on?

He was really crushed

Why are snail shells so shiny?

Because they use snail varnish!

What’s another name for a snail?

A slug in a helmet!

Why don’t French snails take much with them on a journey?

L’ess cargo!

How do slugs send post?

By snail mail!

Why do snails hate mopping the floor?

Because as soon as they’ve finished, they have to start again!

Why was the snail so fun?

He loved having a good slime!

What did the snail say to the slug?

Oh my god, your house has fallen off!

What was wrong with the snail?

It felt a bit sluggish!

Why did the snail stop hanging out with the tortoise?

He couldn’t keep up with the fast-paced lifestyle!

How do snails keep in touch?

They use shell phones!

Why was the snail so shy?

He was a real homebody!

Why was the snail so unpopular?

He was always at home!

What’s a snail’s least favourite food?

Fast food!

What do snails do when they have a fight?

They slug it out!

Where do you find a monster snail?

At the end of a monster’s finger!

What do snails do on the road?

About a mile a day!

What is a snail?

A slug with a crash helmet!

How do snails fight?

They slug it out!