Funny Boat Jokes

These boat jokes are sea-larious!

These funny jokes will really float your boat! If you want more, check out our sea-larious sea jokes for more ocean madness. We've also got more chuckles with  Car jokes , our wheely funny cycling jokes and of course there's loads more on our joke generator

Which vegetable is banned from boats?


How do boats say hello to each other?

They wave!

How do you make a boat feel better?

Give it some vitamin-sea!

Where do zombies go sailing?

The Dead Sea!

Did you hear about the boat that cheated in the race?

It was rigged!

Which boat is the rudest?

The barge!

Did you hear about the oars that fell in love?

It was very row-mantic!

What did the mummy boat say to the baby boat?

Don't be so naughtycal!

Who's the fastest man on the seas?

Usain Boat!

What's a boat's favourite motto?

Seas the day!

Did you hear about the boat that had a baby?

It was a buoy!

What do boats eat with a spoon?

Tomato sloop!

Why was the sail embarrassed?

Because it was passing wind!

Why are boats like shops?

They always have a sail on!

Did you hear about the sale at the paddle shop?

It was a big oar deal!

Where does a boat go when it needs money?

The sand bank!

Why did the boat go to the dock?

It gave into pier pressure!

What was the boats motto?

Do it schooner rather than later!

What's another name for a Captain?

Sails Manager!

What happened when the blue boat crashed into the red boat?

The crew were marooned!

What should you do with a sick boat?

Take it to the doc!

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