Cycling Jokes

Tyred of reading boring jokes? No problem! Check out Beano's basket-full of cycling jokes to get you giggling again!

Want more? Ride on over to our crazy car jokes, funny football jokes or even some daring dance jokes

Better yet... make a stop at Beano's great joke generator

What do you call a door to door bicycle salesman?

A Peddler!

My sister told me I couldn't make a bicycle out of spaghetti.

You should have seen her face when i rode pasta!

When is a bicycle not a bicycle?

When it turns into a driveway!

What do you call a bicycle with a bed on top?

Bedridden!

What dies a cyclist ride in winter?

An icicle!

How did the barber win the bike race?

He took a short cut!

Why did the little boy take his bicycle to bed with him?

Because he didn't want to sleep walk!

Did you hear about the lunatic who won the Tour De France in one day?

He took the psycho path!

Why are bank tellers not allowed to ride bicycles?

They tend to lose their balance!

What do you call an artist who sculpts with bicycle parts?

Cycleangelo!

What do you call a bicycle built by a chemist?

Bike-carbonate of soda!

Why can't a bicycle stand up on its own?

Because it's too tired!

What do you get if you cross a bike and a flower?

Bicycle petals!

What's the difference between a well dressed man on a bike and a poorly dressed man on a unicycle?

Attire!

What does a turtle need to ride a bike?

A shellmet!

What does a cyclist ride in the winter?

An icicle!

What is Thor's favourite cycling competition?

Thor de France!

Teacher: If you got £20 from 5 people, what do you get?

Student: A new bike!

Why couldn't the bike stand up?

It was two-tyred!

What’s the hardest thing about learning to ride a bike?

The ground!

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