Golf Jokes

You'll be laughing down the fairway with Beano's brilliant collection of golf jokes! We know we wood!

Not finished laughing it up? Let us drive you towards some rugby, football or Wimbledon jokes!

What do golfers get in their stockings?

Silly putty!

What’s the difference between driving in golf and driving a car?

When you drive a car you don’t want to hit anything!

Where did the golfers go on their date?

The golf ball!

What did one golf ball say to the other golf ball?

See you roud!

What are the worst words you can hear during a game of golf?

It's still your turn!

What time is it when an elephant steps on your golf ball?

Time to get a new ball!

Why don’t grasshoppers watch golf?

They watch cricket instead!

Why didn’t the skeleton play golf?

His heart wasn't in it!

What's a golfers favourite letter?

Tee!

What does Luke Skywalker say whilst playing golf?

May the course be with you!

How many golfers does it take to change a light bulb?

FOUR!

Why don't British golfers play in the afternoon?

Because it interrupts their tea time!

What do you call a lion playing golf?

Roarin' Mcllroy!

What does a golfer do on his day off?

Putter around!

My friend just collapsed into a display of golf clubs...

Paramedics are doing what they can but he’s not out of the woods yet!

What clubs do drivers belong to?

Golf clubs!

What do you call a sim who's bad at golf?

A diamond in the rough!

I went to the doctor this morning and said “I've swallowed a golf ball..."

The doctor said, “Yes, I can see it's gone down a fairway!"

Why did Tarzan spend so much time on the golf course?

He was perfecting his swing!

When is a birthday cake like a golf ball?

When you slice it!

Why do golfers wear two pairs of shorts?

In case they get a hole in one!

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