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Beano Comic

Neck Jokes

Stick your neck out for these funny jokes! These funny jokes will TURN your day around!

Beano Jokes Team
Last Updated:  October 17th 2021

These neck jokes will have you throwing your head back with laughter! And if you liked these, check out these funny Skeleton Jokes! There's also Fitness Jokes for fitness funnies, and Brain Jokes - they're a no brainer! And of course, there's always more on our main Jokes Page!

Why did the clown have a sore neck?

He slept funny!

Who won best neckwear of the year?

It was a tie!

Why do kangaroos wear polo necks?

They're great jumpers!

Looking back...

My neck hurts!

Why is Dracula so annoying?

He's always breathing down your neck!

Have you heard the one about the giraffe's neck?

I can't tell you, it's too long!

Did you hear about the giraffe race?

It was neck and neck!

Who should you never stick your neck out for?


What do I love most about horses? Their necks!

That's the mane thing!

Since I got my neck brace...

I've never looked back!

Which doctor should you never go to about neck trouble?

Dr. Acula!

What do you call a good looking neck doctor?

A real head-turner!

I don't trust my chiropractor after my last visit..

I'm always looking over my shoulder!

Turtles are real scaredy cats

They hardly ever stick their necks out!

What's made of wool and is 40 foot long?

A giraffe's scarf!

Dracula isn't just a vampire...

He's also a neck-romancer!

Why do giraffes have long necks?

Because their feet smell!

What's a vampire's favourite fruit?


Why do vampires love giraffes?

Because they're a meal and a straw all in one!

Why does no one like Dracula?

Because he's a pain in the neck!