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20 Tuesday Jokes To Get You Through The Week

Looking for some weekday laughter but can't quite handle Mondays? Choose this this ridiculous list of Tuesday jokes!

Beano Jokes Team
Last Updated:  March 5th 2024

Hate Mondays? Well, at least Tuesdays are a bit better! And now they're a lot funnier too with this rib-tickling list of Tuesday jokes! So strap in and have a laugh at these top 20 day of the week gags!

We've got plenty of other good jokes to check out too - from mind-blowing wind jokes to these twenty darts jokes that are bang on the mark, or even these twinkle-toed ballet gags! Jokes all round, whatever day of the week!

Ready to find out why Tuesdays are funnier than you realised? Then read on!

What does a taxidermist do on Tuesdays?

Nothing special, just the usual stuff!

I bought a second-hand time machine next Tuesday

They don’t make them like they’re going to anymore!

What is big at the weekend, small on Tuesday and disappears on Monday?

The letter S!

What is a stuttering ballerinas favourite day of the week?

Tu-Tu Tuesday!

What is the worst day for a loaf of bread?

Toast Day!

What’s the scariest day of the week?


What day of the week do monsters eat people?


What do procrastinators do on Tuesdays?

Decide they’ll start work next Tuesday!

When did the King have his jousting contests?

On Tuesday Knight!

How do you make time go fast on a Tuesday?

Throw a clock!

Why was the gardener walking barefoot outside?

They were celebrating Toesday!

What can really ruin your Friday?

Finding out it’s only Tuesday!

Why didn’t the skeleton laugh at these Tuesday jokes?

She didn’t find them humerus!

Which day of the week do golfers love?


When doesn’t Tuesday start with a “T”?

When it’s Yesterday!

What’s a mathematician’s favourite day of the week?


It’s Shrove Tuesday already…

Really creped up on me!

What follows four days of rain in the UK?


What's the best thing about Tuesdays?

They only happen once a week!

When did Sherlock Holmes solve the mystery?

On a Cluesday!