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27 Wedding Jokes That Guarantee A Great Reception!

These funny wedding jokes aren't old, new, borrowed or blue, but they are hilarious! Check out these 27 funny wedding jokes for kids!

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Beano Jokes Team
Last Updated:  February 1st 2023

These wedding jokes are a match made in heaven! And if you liked these why not check out some awesome art jokes? Or how about these fantastic football jokes? You might even be in the mood for some terrible toilet jokes! And check out even more lols on our main jokes hub!

Two nuclear scientists got married...

The bride was radiant, the groom was glowing!

Did you hear about the phones who got married?

The ceremony was boring, but the reception was terrific!

Did you hear about the spiders who got married?

They met on the web

Did you hear about the florists who got married?

It was arranged!

Did you hear about the Scout masters who got married?

They finally decided to tie the knot!

Why did Comic Sans and Times New Roman get divorced?

He just wasn't her type!

Did you hear about the two angels who got married?

It was a match made in heaven!

Did you hear about the willow trees who got married?

Everyone was weeping!

Did you hear about the two octopuses who got married?

They went off arm in arm in arm in arm!

Did you hear about the snowmen who got married?

The reception was a little frosty!

Did you hear about the t-shirt that married the jeans?

They met online!

What sort of food do you get at a bodybuilders wedding?

A buff-et!

What do you call two spiders who just got married?

Newly webs!

Why did the groom cross the road?

To get to the other bride!

What's the most important ring at a wedding?

The catering!

Why should you get married by the sea?

It's important to have a wedding's beach!

Why did the moth stick to the bride's face?

Because she was glowing!

Why should you get married in a supermarket?

They have the best aisles!

Why did the bride hold her breath during her wedding?

She wanted something blue!

What do you call it when two gardeners get married?

A weeding!

Why should you marry an archaeologist?

The older you get, the more interested in you they'll become!

Did you hear about the two TV remotes who got married?

The reception was muted!

Why did the best man hold up his spectacles

He was told to raise his glasses!

What happened when the alarm clock called off her wedding?

The groom realised it was a wakeup call!

Why didn't the groom give the bride a ring on their wedding day?

He couldn't find his phone!

Why should you bring a peach to a wedding?

You need an after dinner's peach!

How do you know a lemon and a lime are getting married?

Wedding bells are peeling!

The shooting star didn’t turn up to it’s own wedding…

It couldn’t comet!