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31 Birthday Jokes Which Will Totally Cake Your Day!

Here's a bunch of birthday-themed jokes that are so hilarious, they'll blow your candles out!

Beano Jokes Team
Last Updated:  January 23rd 2023

Birthdays are a day for fun and celebration and this collection of hilarious one-liners are guaranteed to tickle your funny bone! Why not try these out on a friend or family member and see if they can keep a straight face? Warning: do not tell these jokes while someone is tucking into their slice of birthday cake or you might get crumbs all over your face!

Once you've recovered from laughing at this lot, why not try these funny English jokes, educational history jokes or movie jokes that might make you spill your popcorn!

How can you tell when a birthday cake is sad?

When it's in tiers!

What's the biggest birthday party you can throw for a dog?

A ball!

A dog eating a donut

Why are birthdays good for you?

Scientific research shows that the people who have the most live the longest!

Why was the cat's birthday party so loud?

They kept turning up the mewsic!

How does sweetcorn spend their birthday?

They relish every moment!

How do you greet a piece of cheese on their birthday?

Hap-brie birthday!

When’s your birthday? March 12.

What year? Every year!

What do you say to a tiger when they're a year older?

It’s roar birthday!

Why did the teddy bear not want any birthday cake?

It was stuffed!

A boy holding a teddy bear

When I was born, I was so surprised...

I didn’t talk for a year and a half!

What sort of birthday cake do ghosts have?

I scream cake

A cat and a ghost

What kind of birthday cake does Elsa love?

Anything covered in frosting and icing!

What does every birthday end with?

The letter Y!

Where do you get your cat's birthday present?

A cat-alogue!

What do you get a farmer for their birthday?

A birthday pheasant!

What did the fart do on their birthday?

They smell-abrated!

Woman holding her nose and fart clouds

What do you say to a tree on their birthday ?

Many sappy returns!

What did the old pirate say on his birthday?

Aye, matey!

What did Harry Potter do on his birthday?

He spell-abrated!

Harry Potter and flying books

What do a birthday cake and a golf ball have in common?

You can slice them!

A mouldy sandwich watches a game of golf

How did sailor celebrate his birthday?

He had a whale of a time!

What do you say to a rabbit on their birthday?

Hoppy birthday!

What does a tortoise do on their birthday?

They shell-a-brate!

A tortoise shell

What do you say to a shark on their birthday?

I hope you have a fin-tastic time!

Why did cavemen not send birthday gifts?

Rocks were too expensive to post!

A prehistoric man in a cave

Why was the toilet full of balloons and cake?

It was a birthday potty!

What do you always get on your birthday?

A year older!

Funny Birthday Jokes
Funny Birthday Jokes

Doctor, I get a burning throat every time I have some birthday cake!

Take the candles off!

A birthday cake

What did one pea say to the other?

A pea birthday!

Mushy peas

Why shouldn't you invite a burglar to a birthday party?

They take the cake!

A burglar giving the thumbs down

Why couldn't the pony sing happy birthday?

They were a little hoarse!