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20 Curses Jokes!

It’s getting spooky in the Vanderhoeven House! But can you handle these hilarious Curses! Jokes, or will you be giggling with the ghouls!?

Beano Jokes Team
Last Updated:  March 9th 2024

Returning stolen artefacts and lifting curses might not sound like a laugh-a-minute, but just you wait till you see what the mummy has in store for you! The jokes might be ancient and old, but if your funny bone is tingling then the curse is on - and they can’t be controlled! Not only that, but if you love a bit of history we’ve got loads of Napoleon facts, and just as many about Ancient Egypt!

What do Roman barbers use?


Why was Montezuma so cursed?

He was Azt-hexed!

What do you call a Roman statue with a cold?

Julius Sneezer

How do you get into a royal tomb?

Follow the Foot-prince

What did people say at the Museum of stolen sculpture?

I didn’t know I was in London!

What did Sky say when she fell in a tomb?

I’ve made a grave-mistake!

Why won’t Larry ever win an argument?

He doesn’t have a leg to stand on!

What do you call an ancient Greek Skateboarder?

An Ollie-mpian!

The bulbs keep flickering!

It must be the lights-Witch!

What did Russ say to the broken suit of armour?

Rust in Peace!

What was the Viking code to lift the curse?

Norse Code!

Why did the pyramid go to counselling?

They were inde-Nile!

Pandora loves skating - but what plants do they grow?


It’s a long way to the old city of Machu Picchu

Alpaca my bags!

Why should you be careful in ancient temples?

Your holiday will get ruin-ed!

What is Alex’s new favourite band?

The Rolling Stones!

Curses! | AppleTV

Why are Sparta statues so dirty?

All that Ancient Grease!

Who is an ancient Egyptian’s best friend?

Their Mummy!

Why was Larry the skull lonely?

He had no-body!

The ancient Inca had special sooth-saying owls

They were inca-hoots!