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20 Man City Jokes that'll Tackle your Funny Bone!

If you're a team of the best team from Manchester AND laughing, then these jokes will have you howling!

Beano Jokes Team
Last Updated:  April 4th 2024

If you're a Manchester City fan, you might find it a little boring watching your team win week in, week out. Yawn! One thing you won't get bored of is laughing at these football funnies featuring Manchester's greatest team.

If you're a Manchester United fan, don't feel left out, as we've got some jokes for you here!

Why do Manchester City players do so well at Beano quizzes?

They know how to use their heads!

Why is a Man City fan learning to sing like a person opening a tin of sardines?

They both have trouble with the key!

A football fan singing on a sofa, with a robot in the background

Which type of pizza is also a football manager?

Pep-peroni Guardiola!

A laughing pepperoni pizza

What's the difference between a dodecahedron and Manchester City?

Manchester City always has more points!

How does Kevin De Bruyne keep cool?

He stands near his fans!

Kevin De Bruyne

What is Ederson's least favourite drink?


What does Erling Haaland and a magician have in common?

Hat tricks!

Why is the pitch at the Etihad always wet?

Because the players dribble everywhere!

Which boat always ends up at Manchester City?

The Premiership!

Why aren't Manchester City allowed to own a dog?

Because they can't hold onto a lead!

What is a Manchester City fan's favourite kind of music?

The blues!

What do you call Manchester City's ground with no fans in it?


I set my email password to ‘ManCityAttack’…

And it said it was strong!

Manchester City's phone number ends with 1111...

That's won-won-won-won!

Why did Ederson spend ages on his computer?

He couldn't stop saving his work!

Manchester City's goalkeeper

Why was Jack Grealish upset on his birthday?

Someone gave him a red card!

A referee

Who's the funniest Manchester City player?

Erling Ha-ha-land!

Erling Haaland jokes

How many Manchester City rivals does it take to screw in a light bulb? 

None – they'll always be in their shadow!

What does Phil Foden do after missing an easy goal?

Turns off his games console!

A goat and some gaming controllers

Why do Manchester City play better in the second half?

Because they get a Pep talk!